스크립트
00:00:00did you guys ever consider a career in the military i i remember i was in graduate school
00:00:05and i would get the reserve emails and i really thought i was like damn 20 grand right now i was
00:00:11like i can't i remember my wife's like dude anyone i talked to was like you're gonna hate it though
00:00:15you can't just go away i'm like it's just the weekends and they're like yeah every weekend
00:00:19for like what four years and i was like on the brink and then they're like dude i was like yeah
00:00:23i'm not doing that so i've never considered it ever ever not even once you could have done a
00:00:28career in comedy i don't know this could have been a we could have found out that everyone's
00:00:32original life plans had crossed i wish i would have done it i could use some structure some
00:00:36discipline some uh older male influence i could have used some everything that the military teaches
00:00:43i think i needed and would have been great but because nobody was giving me the discipline to go
00:00:48hey you should go do that i didn't do it yeah you didn't even have the discipline to start becoming
00:00:52disciplined yeah when you grow up like me dude on the mean streets you know it's either gang life or
00:00:57basketball and i chose no that's not real i i remember do you know what it was i remember
00:01:03they repealed don't ask don't tell and i was like all right i can't i can't yeah what's that it was if
00:01:08you're gay you're not supposed to ask someone if they're gay now i think you're like allowed to ask
00:01:12i don't know what even happened with that i think i just asked for their papers this is your area of
00:01:16expertise chuck and what happened there was a time where are you a gay citizen yeah you could you
00:01:22couldn't if you were gay in the military you couldn't say anything so it was they weren't
00:01:26allowed to ask you but that you but you weren't allowed to tell them but could you fuck jocko
00:01:31just who cares about telling people you're gay i know that's all these college i'm pretty sure you
00:01:35could yeah thousand guys i can't confirm that myself yeah yeah yeah you just put in your
00:01:39earplugs in the bunks like uh these guys just statistically if you have a thousand guys in one
00:01:43boat yeah that's gonna happen you just gotta be first you know and if they're gonna get me well
00:01:51i mean you know it doesn't have to be like that man oh i didn't know god damn man i didn't know where
00:01:55we're headed is there a height limit in the seals i have to like if someone's taller right like you're
00:02:01only what six six four yeah yeah you get like six six six seven there's just more of you to hit
00:02:05i don't think there's a height limit because there's a guy that i think is six seven or six eight
00:02:10something like that what's the shortest guy in the seals i know no woman has ever cracked it i want
00:02:15to say five three oh yeah that's a bad dude though five three and still did it no women you guys
00:02:21know that in the seals there's never been a woman not yet that says you dude
00:02:26well there's that french w nba player that she wouldn't make it that's what the current trans
00:02:32have you seen this guy go that says she's going viral all week she's having a good week she's
00:02:36probably real happy about all this wnba crefuffle yeah do you know the story can you explain every
00:02:41video has popped up there's just a trans yeah it's a it's a biological male that transitioned into a
00:02:46woman who's playing in a professional women's basketball league in france and because
00:02:51the sophie cunningham and all the issues in the last few weeks with the xxxy kind of campaign
00:02:57drumming up all this trans talk uh they're like well let this lady play draft her over there and
00:03:01watch how inclusive they'll be but everybody's just showing videos of this like muscular i mean she's
00:03:06jacked really she's almost like a guy i mean i'm for it i i think it's time the wnba yeah wnba is
00:03:15it's a drama now yeah it's like race it's like racial kind of tension throw that on top sexual
00:03:21orientation apparently all of the the straight chicks get bullied and stuff in the uh locker
00:03:26room yeah can you tell me this like all of the yeah it's like inverse homophobia bro how pissed are
00:03:31they gonna be when the first when the first trans wnba player is straight and white they're gonna be
00:03:38pissed and french do you know what i'm saying because she's trans but and they're gonna go look
00:03:42how inclusive we are but she's still straight and white i kind of want to turn the wnba into like
00:03:47the xfl i think we should just come make it like even what's the exit what's xfl xfl was on vince
00:03:52mcmahon try to like start his own football thing but it was like it was just chaos it was like nfl blitz
00:03:56like you could have a guy on the sideline who at any time could just run in and hit somebody
00:04:02and then he was like i was like we're gonna put cameras in the women's locker room and we're like
00:04:05what women that's football and what like that was just saying he was just thinking of a wwe internal
00:04:12okay so literally that was the thing the guy that did wwe tried to make a football league
00:04:17and it went badly yeah one season i remember the one their jerseys the names one guy's was like he
00:04:23hate me yeah they got to wear nicknames yeah i like that that was cool yeah it was like a spectacular
00:04:28failure he tried to do i think for maybe one year and it just didn't didn't work out they brought it
00:04:33back they brought it back like years later it's uh did also bad yeah sorry bless you i've done this a
00:04:41lot guys i'm very professional with this sneezing interrupting i'm sorry what do you think about this
00:04:46stuff jocko it's interesting to listen to it's like a date carry stumbled upon no i'll be honest
00:04:53at first i was i was a wmba hater now it's like it's exciting i like i love the drama now you're
00:04:59telling me that you're you got some more another dimension to the dramas coming in it's like yeah
00:05:03this is well if they do it i'll watch it then if they start putting in some uh some trans athletes
00:05:06i'd watch that i guess for a minute to see if it changes anything i think it will like there's a pro
00:05:11girls a baseball league right now it's like a softball thing i've been watching that and it's
00:05:15been fantastic but oh that's on in the gym that's on in lifetime it's been great yeah it's good yeah
00:05:19it's been awesome softball pitches are it's not about them being women it's about if the product's
00:05:23good enough so like if the if the women had eight foot rims and these chicks could dunk on each other
00:05:29and the court was a little smaller and the ball was a little smaller i would probably give it a shot
00:05:34but the problem is like i watch whatever the best of the thing is like i've got nba i can watch that
00:05:38they're better than these girls and so i don't want to watch a worse product i don't watch high
00:05:43school baseball and then be like you're being mean to the high school boys it's like no i watch pro
00:05:47baseball they're better than the high school boys what about college i also don't have a wife that's
00:05:51gonna get mad at me for saying any of this i don't think wives i can think wives don't care at all
00:05:56about the wmba oh really yeah no one has a wife who's like you better shut up from l.a i don't know
00:06:01they all care but the number one consumer of female sports is still men yes like it's really
00:06:08like yeah the number one specter it's not women watching women's sports i'll say 100 of the people
00:06:13who watch the wmb are uh they they all like women if you watch the wmba you go home to pussy like that's
00:06:20a rule do you know what i'm saying if it's a guy watching the wmba he likes chicks and if it's a girl
00:06:26watch the dumb yeah he likes chicks or she likes chicks that's how it works nobody's ever dunked
00:06:31the ball and then went home to wiener that's not a it's all it's fair point it's all
00:06:38pussy it's testosterone yes but when you think about sports that don't have that skill gap like bjj
00:06:44right that is just as popular or a lot of the ufc female ufc fighters ronda rousey was like
00:06:50one of the biggest stars in the world so maybe it is what's the level of skill if it's comparable
00:06:55yeah male league to female league yeah people will turn up and watch yeah yeah and you could not
00:07:03it'd be really bad to watch uh females fighting males it would not be fair right we've tried that
00:07:09a couple of times it doesn't go well i think the girls would beat them up too bad that's it yeah
00:07:13whenever someone with enough people pixar they always win well when enough people don't like
00:07:16a thing i automatically like it like now i like the wmba now everyone hates it i'm like it's actually
00:07:20awesome it's a good ball there's a question that me and one of my housemates ask which is like
00:07:25uh at what age do you think that you could beat the best in the world in a particular sport so in
00:07:32like a 12 year old elite level soccer player like are you as good at soccer as a 12 year old like the
00:07:39best 12 year old in the world no like could you submit you know like it's different i guess in bjj
00:07:45because of weight classes and stuff like that like the best 15 year old in the world i wanted to do this
00:07:50on a show with fighting i came up with this idea where like i wanted like yeah you get a five-year-old
00:07:55in there it's easy pretty easy for me you could take them we go six year old i go yeah this is what
00:07:58i mean and we just keep ranking up until someone beats my ass and it's probably going to be 12 year
00:08:03old an 11 year old that just annihilates me and that'll be fun to watch too do you train uh no that's
00:08:08another part of it that it would be pretty quick you know you could find a 10 year old bring my ankle
00:08:13and knock me the hell out um but yeah for sports that's interesting i don't know because i'm not very good at
00:08:17soccer and shit either how do you guys reckon you get on a seal selection jocko got to kind of assess
00:08:23people for a good while like if you haven't got a background like i mean i just think about this
00:08:29i've been swimming so you have been swimming swimming good to go yeah i'm pretty much ready to go
00:08:36ready to go pretty much yeah just let me know i bought this watch at panorites navy seals so oh yeah
00:08:42how much is it what's the physical requirement like what would you ask the physical requirements are
00:08:47pretty low actually they're not anything crazy and if you were like a normal high school athlete
00:08:52you have the physical capabilities of doing it interesting yeah but once you get in there it's
00:08:58definitely challenging from a physical perspective only in the sense that you get so physically beaten
00:09:04down and broken down that mentally you have to be able to hang on so it's you know everybody says
00:09:09it's more mental than physical that's not really true either because if you can't climb that damn rope
00:09:14then you're not making it how high is the rope again there's 30-foot ropes there's 10-foot ropes
00:09:18there's a bunch of different ropes so that's just one example obviously but some guys you know
00:09:22it's all mental no you need to train physically because otherwise you won't be able to get through
00:09:26any of the basic physical competency tests that you're going to get but it is mental too because
00:09:32you can have total studs going through there and they quit just as much as a slacker now is the
00:09:37rope like a like a a like a frame wood thing that you climb up or you just have to climb lots of ropes
00:09:42right yeah there's an obstacle course where you got to climb a bunch of different ropes and then
00:09:46there's just straight up 30-foot rope like there's a 10 of them out on the beach and you just got to
00:09:50climb these ropes and back down yeah you make make you climb them until you can't climb them anymore
00:09:54dang when you tell me a story i was asking about why there's an age limit and i think is it 30 30 34 35 or
00:10:01something the selection tends to get it's around 31 i think is the actual cutoff and occasionally a guy
00:10:08will get through that's like 32 or 33 got a special permission or special waivers they call it and then
00:10:13maybe a 33 year old but that's that's it's rare and i was asking about the cargo net there's these
00:10:20huge big cargo nets that you climb up and i think you told me a story there's some dude who's like super
00:10:23fatigued got over the top and essentially from the top of a 30 or 50 foot cargo net with all of his
00:10:28shit on just like just hit the sand but he was 21 so he's made of rubber and magic so he just bounced
00:10:34onto his feet and ran off what you know like just somebody drank from like a high yeah oh yeah landed
00:10:40and was largely okay and i think okay that guy plus 15 years at like 38 yeah it's like you're dust
00:10:47yeah you've just like evaporated you'd be here for my attorney right away they take my house away if i break
00:10:52my leg you know that's that's a wrap on me yeah yeah were you able to pick very well do you think before
00:10:58people came in matter of fact i was just talking to somebody the other day that's a that did a bunch
00:11:02of years as an instructor and said you know could you eventually figure out who's gonna make it he's
00:11:07like nope you can't you can't look at a human being and figure out if they're gonna make it or not
00:11:11interesting just just can't tell whether they're five three or six nine you know you think that guy's
00:11:15too small or that guy's too big doesn't matter yeah it's just there's something there's something in
00:11:19their head that makes them not gonna quit i saw a thing on netflix about the navy seals that pissed me off
00:11:24they used to do this thing and i believe they still do it but this was netflix you know they
00:11:28said that they once you get through the thing and that's very hard right and then you go to now you're
00:11:33in the platoon you've done enough time where they go you're in now you've you've passed it even after
00:11:37the buds like you've you're in the platoon because sometimes you make it and then you you can get
00:11:42kicked out because you're not you're not made of whatever but then they put this thing on you they
00:11:46punch it in all the guys go and they punch this like uh this crest on what's it called it's called
00:11:51the trident yeah trident on you and they all your sergeant everybody they get to go give you
00:11:55give you a nice punch but you made it now so you're happy they're like they stopped doing
00:11:59this in 1994 because of hazing or something yeah i'm like what you don't have to like worry about
00:12:04the navy seals you know it's not like he's gonna be like after all of that they put in now i need
00:12:10to file a report against my son like what are we doing yeah they still do it don't they i would
00:12:15be confident that they yeah likely still do that good unofficially of course ridiculous if they
00:12:20stop doing that but that's what netflix is in it with the problem being that if you've been through
00:12:25eating sand for like a week with no sleep some guy hitting you a little bit too hard on your new
00:12:30button right isn't the biggest crime now it sounds kind of lame to do it at all well no it's not
00:12:36nothing i mean they're really putting it in your skin so it's not nothing but what i'm saying is
00:12:40that like it's an honor at that point they're like it's they i'm proud of this badge like this should
00:12:45mark i don't know with chris now punching a keychain is kind of like yeah well we're not made of what
00:12:50they're made of black belts black belts as well right when someone graduates some people do oh yeah
00:12:58they whip you yeah you just walk down like a gauntlet of guys on either side and then as you get your
00:13:03belt you get whipped not everyone does that i thought some people do some people don't okay
00:13:07you know just depends on the vibe of the school what you're into you got to get that last little
00:13:12licking on somebody i guess before he's got the black belt and you need to respect it yeah
00:13:17whip it up like a dish town yeah yeah well apparently they said to strangers just to confuse them
00:13:22what's that guy's dealing here what's his problem yeah they uh they said we're like you know it's
00:13:30modern people are one of the first societies that don't have like a ruthless entry to like manhood
00:13:35so like pretty much every other society beforehand you had to do like really shitty up stuff
00:13:40before you were there was like a a thing that moved you from a boy to a man is this uh it's something
00:13:47like that isn't it yeah the rite of passage type thing like that jumped off the the the tower with
00:13:56like the vine around their legs you ever seen that no oh yeah dude's at somewhere in africa they built
00:14:01like a tower out of whatever trees and bamboo and stuff and then they tie a vine around their legs
00:14:06and it stops them just short of hitting the ground but yeah that's their man that's not even using for
00:14:11that good one i guess a vine yeah the most can i get a new vine i don't want to use the same jaco
00:14:20no they should do they should do a thing called a sub incision where they would take a
00:14:24a boy's penis and slit a cut up the front of it oh i had this yeah you had this
00:14:31wow you're in like the comb tribe yeah they would cut it open so you would like i don't
00:14:38know it's supposed to like remind you about like girls or something oh god but they would slice your
00:14:42dick and then it would like heal what kind of girls it reminds me of vaginas it was just kind
00:14:46of like yes this is what vaginas are like yeah to cut a giant hole in your penis and be like that's
00:14:50good it's called the sales then it would heal up and you would always now you have like a man's i
00:14:54have no trouble thinking about girls and i've never had this procedure at all well imagine how much more
00:14:59would i think that's it yeah how much would you have unlocked if you've done it crap dude unbelievable
00:15:04go crazy yeah the things people used to do were crazy they would do another one where they would
00:15:07just pick two villagers and they would be like you know a boy and a girl they'd make them have sex
00:15:11and they would just crush them with logs and everyone be like all right happy new year yeah
00:15:18it was pretty pretty why'd we use my kid you mean like greeks throwing plates at a party or
00:15:22something yeah this was like way way back like you know and like papua new guinea you know you
00:15:27always can have people that are assholes a lot of this is just people that are assholes because
00:15:30you know you take anybody and they're like and initiate people and your father's initiate you like
00:15:34hey good job you know good job and then and then you're over here like with the with the scalp
00:15:40right yeah there's always people that get real where to go next because it's the same
00:15:44and that's why you know you talk about some of this navy stuff it's at a certain point as military
00:15:48indoctrination or military hazing rituals there's always someone that's like you know what i got a better
00:15:54idea and it's going to be doing something really stupid you used to have like a safety guy you know
00:15:59if you if you have a hazing incident going down or a hazing ritual you have to have a guy that's like
00:16:03okay hey bro no put the scalpel away or whatever the thing yeah get off your penis because we're
00:16:08still touching the face yeah we still do this there's sadistic people there's there are sadistic people
00:16:12yeah in wherever in any organization and by the way when you get rid of like the actual soft people
00:16:20so now you get you go to the soft people and you just have military dudes like yeah there's there's
00:16:25even more sadistic people in there so you got to have some kind of limits on what you're doing
00:16:29otherwise people are getting their scalpel on their deck yeah like that like that pirate was there was
00:16:33some famous pirate and the only reason he climbed the ranks so much is because he was more psychopathic
00:16:38he was like i'll just i'll get him to talk you want me to cut his dick off and they're like what
00:16:42and then he would like literally and they're like all right that's the new guy like they they would just
00:16:45out barbarian each other on the pirate ships for rank that's one of the reasons that psychopaths
00:16:50are supposed to have existed like why why would they uh prevail like why would the way why would
00:16:56they have stayed in the evolutionary gene pool it's like well if you've only got 50 of you it's maybe
00:17:01not that useful but if there's a little few more of you maybe you need some vikings to go and raid
00:17:04lindisfarne sure and like pillage and come back and not have ptsd and you go oh like you're actually
00:17:10kind of destructive in a small group but pretty useful if you've got a couple of hundred of you
00:17:15and there's oh there's there's enough people there yeah we used to have this like a a little a little
00:17:19drawing in the seal teams and it was it was a little frog man like a little frog and it's and he was
00:17:24inside of a glass case and it said in case of war break glass and that's true like there are guys even
00:17:31if you look back at the historical you know military heroes a lot of those guys were totally out of
00:17:37control as normal civilians and then whatever a war broke out they joined up and they're a hero and
00:17:44they have something to do and something to focus their energy on and something to put their aggression
00:17:48their testosterone to that's the 100 the guy you want that's the tool so it's rough when you're in
00:17:53peacetime and you got these guys that are are you know they're vikings right they're they're just born
00:17:58and bred to kill other people and then you're like hey actually you got to be in a uniform inspection
00:18:02tomorrow the guys are like what you're talking about those guys are weapons yeah yeah yeah it's like
00:18:07it's like uh stirring your coffee with your gun and they're like what are you doing you're like
00:18:11well i'm using the wrong tool that's all these guys are tools you know they're like weapons yeah
00:18:16they don't know what to do when people aren't using them as a what do you do with those guys just like
00:18:19a working dog right like a working dog you do people say oh you got a german shepherd like oh is it
00:18:23you know german shepherd like working dog no no no you don't want a working dog in your house you
00:18:27don't want the dogs that we had in the military you do not want one of those things as your pet
00:18:34because it will bite some people that's what they do that's literally what they're bred for
00:18:38and what they're trained for and so you can't just have that thing in your house and expect when
00:18:42the amazon dude shows up he's not getting a a bite on his neck or his face like that's what's happening
00:18:47so there's guys in the military that are a hundred percent like that and they're barely hanging on
00:18:54and when you're in a leadership position you're like god you gotta hey you gotta check on those
00:18:58guys you gotta make sure that you give them some outlet for the aggression that they've got what
00:19:02sort of outlet do you give somebody that isn't just more war well i mean you you luckily working out
00:19:08doing jiu-jitsu boxing fighting wrestling and and again that's you're doing that to to mitigate the
00:19:15amount of aggression that this pressure release yeah it's just like pressure release it's not saying
00:19:19that occasionally a dude just doesn't go out in town and beat up like four bouncers at a bar or
00:19:24whatever you know it's yep yep you got to deal with it and it happens and a lot of times those guys
00:19:29you know in the navy as your career goes on you on your uniform you get stripes i think it's one stripe
00:19:36on your sleeve for every year that you've been in and if you've had good good conduct the whole time
00:19:42those stripes at a certain point they all become gold and if you don't have good conduct then you have
00:19:48red stripes so you see like in a seal team a bunch of those guys they've been in for 20 years they
00:19:53got red stripes like they got in trouble here they got in a bar fight there they got yeah that's that's
00:19:57good it's like the rings of a tree you're going like oh that year was a really rough one that was
00:20:01the one when you got back on the booth it reminds me of red dead redemption when you're going through
00:20:05and you're like it lets you know if you're a bad cowboy or a good cowboy as you're going but since
00:20:09it's a video game you just go full bad cowboy yeah but that's the same thing like you can see your
00:20:14honor yeah like it's like an honor kind of thing it's been tracked what uh without saying who it is
00:20:20or whatever what are some of them like most extreme guys that you'd seen either in the seals or that
00:20:25you'd heard about like people who had a you're talking about very very extreme people in a group
00:20:32of very extreme people are there any examples that sort of come to mind i mean guys there's guys that
00:20:38definitely would get kicked out of the military because they got in too many fights got drunk too
00:20:43many times and again those guys a lot of the times those guys that you would want in war a hundred
00:20:49percent so that you know what you're looking for optimally is a guy that can contain that enough
00:20:55that they can make it and and still just about hold on just about hold on and of course you know you
00:21:01need like the real professional guys and that are that are gonna keep control of those dudes because
00:21:08if you don't have that then it's gonna get out of control real quick and occasionally like platoons
00:21:13would get this is in the seal teams a platoon would get disbanded they would just take a whole
00:21:18platoon and just disband a platoon and usually that was because the leadership didn't have control
00:21:24over the boys and if the boys get out of control like that there's nothing to stop them and eventually
00:21:29they're just gonna get in enough fights and break enough stuff and you know just do bad stuff yeah
00:21:34it's like uh the lord of the flies with it's like the guys in the back of the kids at the back of the
00:21:38class that always sit in a row and they always disrupt everybody else and you're like hey no you
00:21:42you you're gonna be over there you're in a different the concept of the movie the dirty
00:21:45dozen right is like we got these guys they're all in the brig like they're criminals but we've got
00:21:50this kind of mission that needs to get done cool we'll put tape them and put them over here that's what
00:21:54we're gonna do so there is an element of that you know you don't you don't wake up like me i'm a kid
00:22:00what do you ask a kid what do you want to do when you grow up oh i want to go carry a machine gun and
00:22:03kill people that's not that's not a normal thing right so you've got those people that's what we want
00:22:10to do and so of course you're gonna end up with some people that are like that can't really can't
00:22:15contain that as well and it's you know it's it's a bummer but it's also again go look at the history of
00:22:22american heroes not all of them some of them are boy scouts right some of them are legit boy scouts and
00:22:27they were they were just good people that joined the military for god and country there's that's
00:22:32absolutely an element of our american heritage but there's another american heritage of hell's angels
00:22:38right you're in the military but you could have been in the hell's angels because you want to fight and
00:22:41you want to carry a machine gun and kill people that's of course you've got people like that and you know
00:22:46that's what that's what the military is it's made up of those and and the military puts
00:22:52like you were saying earlier you you need a discipline you needed some direction and and that's
00:22:57true for a lot of young men that want to fight they want to carry a machine gun they want to go to war
00:23:03if you don't join the military what are you going to do you're going to end up in some kind of a gang
00:23:07you're going to be a criminal of some kind so cool join the military we'll take that energy we'll take
00:23:11that aggression we'll take that testosterone and we'll do something totally productive with it and
00:23:15and and most of the time you know most of the people in the military they're able to contain it
00:23:19and they they get through or they get through their career and then it's fine occasionally a guy like
00:23:25just a little off gas happens and boom you get a little explosion and somebody gets stabbed somebody
00:23:30gets you know whatever big fights happen and bad things go down and people get kicked out of the
00:23:35military they get sent to the brig or whatever the supplement industry is full of products making
00:23:39claims that they can't back which is why i'm such a massive fan of momentous their co-founder jeff
00:23:43byers played in the nfl and saw firsthand just how wildly the quality of supplements can vary so
00:23:48he built momentous around a higher standard every product from momentous uses evidence-backed ingredients
00:23:54transparent doses and independent third-party testing everything is nsf certified for sports so
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00:24:29that's l-i-v-e-m-o-m-e-n-t-o-u-s dot com slash modern wisdom and modern wisdom at checkout yeah i remember
00:24:36i was in uh i think i was in like tucson and there was uh there's a bunch of navy seals there and they
00:24:43met me after a show we're always like hanging out and i met them before in san diego and they're you
00:24:47know just chilling and they're pretty like it's like a plain clothes it's just like pretty much
00:24:50flannels and and uh these two girls were there talking to them by the time i got there and then
00:24:55the girls were with these guys who kind of came later and started kind of like puffing their feathers
00:25:01up and they had no idea these guys were like navy seals and i was watching the whole time like please
00:25:04fucking kick their ass i want to see it so bad but they they were they were reserved they had one guy
00:25:09finally went up it was there was like eight of them i'm like dude you guys are gonna die well they
00:25:13kind of know that there's been light work you know this exactly they were they were kind of laughing
00:25:17but at the same time you could really see them kind of like yeah and then eventually one went
00:25:22up to him was like said something to him they were just like okay and left where can i get one of
00:25:26those working dogs i hate my amazon delivery guy yeah yeah put the packages on the patio don't leave it
00:25:33at the door the selection the selection of working dogs is probably the most stringent way more stringent
00:25:40than any military special operations selection process the amount of dogs that enter the pipeline to
00:25:46become a working dog it's probably like one out of every 20 or 30 that actually become a full-fledged
00:25:53working dog yeah any girl dogs i don't know i don't know i think so why is it why what why he hates
00:25:59girls no that's not sure they can't join the wnba is that no no no i was trying to say it would be
00:26:06women could start using that argument like there's plenty of girl dogs in there they're probably girl
00:26:13dogs are vicious girl dogs yeah they're very one a girl dog jared chat gpt are the female working
00:26:21dogs in the seal part of the seal military in the military yeah what's the proportion now we're back
00:26:25i want to know what the proportion of i want to make up my earlier sexist remark you're looking for
00:26:30equal uh he said a sexist thing but then he really won us over about the female dogs because the dogs
00:26:38can dunk yes which is what's important right i saw everybody everybody was a girl dog so she broke a lot
00:26:44of boundaries uh yes they do uh 73 percent male 26 female we're back ladies go up a little bit go up
00:26:54because the the patrol and apprehension okay they're in there for patrol i didn't see a patrol and apprehension
00:26:58at first what are they belgian malwa's pretty for the most part in in the seal teams it's mouse yep
00:27:04check and because they're smaller yeah smaller easier to like jump with ever see how high
00:27:08they can jump belgian malwa yeah they're psycho dude they can clip they can like eight foot fast
00:27:14right over boom it's they're insane that's why i need one man oh they could literally
00:27:19i want to get malwa so bad the first time i ever saw one work it was this training training
00:27:24event and we're taking down this big building and they're like hey we gotta have this dog out here
00:27:28and he's gonna you know we'll show you how it works and everything and i'm kind of like whatever
00:27:31how's this dog gonna whatever i just didn't really think much of it and all so they had a guy that was
00:27:36plenty in the dog suit that was going to run away from the target building and so i'm outside i'm the
00:27:41you know ground force commander i'm watching they go hey you know here the guy's gonna run away so i'm
00:27:45watching to see the guy run away and i see the dog you know they're like they say whatever german
00:27:50words the dog and the things and just locked in i was like oh and then he says what gets this dog
00:27:57wanted blood yeah and he lets there's a quick release that they have like a trigger on the on
00:28:03the leash pulls that thing and this thing bro it took off going a thousand miles an hour
00:28:11launched at this dude and just took him down like nothing and just started mangling this dog suit
00:28:18and i was like we want these things that's what we want yeah yeah it's so hard yeah they put the
00:28:22metal implants on the cane it's like those predator dogs from that movie i'm telling you meanwhile yours
00:28:28is in the sidecar of your motorcycle with goggles on hey tell me where to get one of these i kind of
00:28:32want a dog that will bite these at the coffee shop always give me a hard time you know i want a little
00:28:37respect around that you're going with a mallet mar and a trigger on this side car god you don't want
00:28:42me to release this jocko told me it's gonna be bad news it's gonna lock in i don't know german but
00:28:49there there's a guy i don't know if he has he's only made a couple videos but he he owns a convenience
00:28:53store so he just he has some sort of trained dog that he like unleashes on people loitering outside
00:28:58of this yeah that's great he only has two videos we need more of that he has to wait for his content
00:29:02two videos he's in jail that's what i mean he's just like go the dog the dogs don't bite they come
00:29:06up the guy's jesus christ yeah people are scared of dogs there's a big like canine unit thing inside
00:29:12of the military and then you guys have one for seals too there's yeah there's so there's just dog
00:29:16handlers the mil the whole military all almost all ground troops have some access to some kind of
00:29:22military dogs military working dogs yeah that's fucking cool seals should get some water animals
00:29:27dude figure that out they have them they do yeah how does that work top secret uh
00:29:32and i want names this time all right that's how you get podcasting clicks first and last name
00:29:38and you explain so i don't know the name of this particular dolphin but yeah yeah yeah they have
00:29:42they have yeah they have they have mammals that work that's wow yeah they do yeah do you remember
00:29:48like a dolphin yeah like dolphins and others nobody's you know china doesn't stand a chance against us
00:29:56i feel like we're really breaking new ground sharing this you might get in trouble yeah no they got water
00:30:00it's on youtube in the navy seals yeah that's sick what do they do you know they they perform various
00:30:06missions for you're with me dude here no you're absolutely i'm not falling for it no i want to
00:30:13believe so best like a dolphin with like a little turd on its head it's not a turret yeah it's a laser
00:30:20like a i don't know how much this is uh available on on the internet you have to ask your people for
00:30:27the internet okay okay on the internet can we can we see military dolphins i feel so dumb if this is
00:30:31made up i want to talk to the guy no i want to see if it's true jocko's making sure that he's not
00:30:36going to get popped by the dod oh that's true true never mind don't even anything yeah don't risk it
00:30:41do you remember we were at dinner with palmer lucky and he was somebody asked him a question you know
00:30:45palmer he's the guy behind uh anduril he made the oculus which was that that vr thing anduril's a
00:30:51tagline war technology company is fight unfair that's the tagline it's so hard and he has an
00:30:58answer for everything if you just want to ask him some about like hey how would this have a military
00:31:02application and we were at dinner do you remember someone asked him about has anyone tried to make
00:31:06sharks be useful and he's like oh absolutely because the uh immune system of a shark means that they can go
00:31:12forever so what you do is you get a bag of glucose stick it to the side of a shark put a
00:31:16fucking hypodermic syringe in it never needs to eat you use it as like a tracking animal and this
00:31:23thing can go for a thousand miles without having but how optimistic that's real optimistic you know
00:31:30because you go all right we got this shark we put a thing with the glucose in the street
00:31:34and so far he's eating a thousand fish you know they don't need to eat yeah but my point is
00:31:40he's not going to do what you want him to do dolphins are doing it how do you program the shark to go get
00:31:46these russians or so yeah how do you i wasn't in the technicalities okay i'm the ideas guy yeah
00:31:52because i just got the sharks he's swimming around out there we spent a hundred grand on this
00:31:55and now he's just all the glucose thought on how to give him the orders we're supposed to be eating
00:32:00koreans right now true he's out there swimming around trying to bang another shark with a glucose
00:32:04syringe on it you know what i'm saying like it's not i don't know i believe the dolphins
00:32:10did you ever get into the john lily it's the military dolphin program i'm going to smile
00:32:14about this tonight seth just restart that from the very beginning what does he say
00:32:22i can't confirm or deny whether we have kamikaze dolphins america's top military leaders were asked
00:32:27how to kill dolphins can you kind of clarify these reports of kamikaze dolphins the animation's so
00:32:33funny the question sounds ridiculous but the history behind it is real since the 1960s the u.s
00:32:39navy has trained dolphins there we go for military work not reportedly to blow things up but to do
00:32:45things like find underwater mines recover lost equipment and help protect ships and harbors the program is
00:32:50called the u.s navy marine man and it still exists and america was not the only country doing this
00:32:56during the cold war the soviet navy built its own military dolphin program in the black sea
00:33:01after the soviet union collapsed and in 2000 the bbc reported that ukraine transferred part
00:33:07of its military dolphin project to iran that's why this is what the hell now the u.s and iran are
00:33:13oh dude is there a dolphin battle right now dolphins oil routes on earth and now even the weirdest
00:33:19pieces of military history are being pulled back into the conversation so no the pentagon didn't
00:33:23confirm kamikaze dolphins but it did confirm something else the standoff with iran has gotten
00:33:28strange enough that weaponized dolphins are now being discussed at a u.s military briefing
00:33:33that's wow dude also you just think it's not gonna go well dude because the dolphin's gonna swim
00:33:38up to some fishing boat you know it's gonna go these guys got fishes up and then you know it's just not
00:33:43you need control of these things they're trainable i've had one in mexico unreliable i've had a
00:33:49dolphin in mexico friendly as hell yeah well that's my problem actually scary he's gonna come up to you
00:33:55and then you go what do you got ticking on your back there buddy you know dude no they're actually
00:33:59scary i thought dolphins were like you play in the ocean i would myself if one of these came up to me
00:34:04they're huge dolphins they're terrifying like big water dogs i was in the thing in mexico they get
00:34:08you get in like a little like it's like a little dock but under the waters you can stand they swim
00:34:13up and i was like my kids were there and they were scared i'm like don't be scared guys we're all right
00:34:17just touch it you can tell i was like oh my god you go first little buddy don't be afraid that's bait
00:34:23yeah no i think they're sweethearts i rode them around in mexico before i knew it was not appropriate
00:34:29i posted all the photos and everyone's like you monster i was like i'm just kidding it was a fake
00:34:33you've had pictures huh you pet a dolphin too no i rode it around and shit yeah like it was like
00:34:38it's around yeah like you could grab on it's uh grab its fin my girlfriend at the time was small
00:34:42enough that she could uh now that i just don't have a girlfriend anymore it's not like i have the
00:34:46same girlfriend she's gotten bigger ah you gotta do the sperm whale tour my girlfriend back when
00:34:52she was small enough no but she would actually stand on that in there yeah she was able to do
00:34:57it because she was you know little but i had to like kind of lay down and like let him pull me you're like
00:35:03boogie boarding yeah i didn't know that they hate it there those dolphins that like because they're
00:35:07meant they're like they use echoes and they used to like miles of sea yeah so it don't matter what
00:35:12you put them in they're gonna freak out and they're feeding them full of fish with little
00:35:16uh pills for ulcers and yeah it's not good but we didn't know any of that and then we had a fun time
00:35:21yeah it was a great day it's like 200 bucks yeah i i same way i got there and i'm like oh man this is
00:35:26kind of sad yeah in that little pond but they're looking at me like help me i i was i cheaped out
00:35:31give me a ride you got yourself into this yeah i cheaped out on the like yeah the lord of the sea
00:35:36thing where you kind of like hold it felt cool it looked awesome yeah was this when you were so were
00:35:41you sober at this time or no no this was a long time ago like 2008 or 2009 okay yeah drunken dolphin
00:35:47we were drunk for sure yeah there's no way you're doing that sober there's no like sober yeah yeah also
00:35:53so many stories in my life are like i went to a thing that was for kids yeah and i'm the guy there
00:35:59that's like yeah i'll do this and then everyone's like why is he out here well like i want to run the
00:36:03bases at the cardinals game it's just me and like a bunch of little kids and so there's so many of my
00:36:08stories are just drunk jeff with a bunch of family things does sound bad when you say that a bunch of
00:36:13stories with drunk jeff and a bunch of little kids well it's like yeah these families are going why is
00:36:17this guy with the kid this guy sucks yeah i went to a water park way too late it was me and shane went me and
00:36:23shane was a water park and it was like a small one too i came down the water we had like gym shorts
00:36:28too we didn't baton suits right come down you come down so you're instantly like vacuum sealed so
00:36:33just your tiny flashes of penis sticking out and there'd be a guy just waiting for his kid just be me
00:36:38like he's just like my same age just be like what the why are you doing this why should the kids have
00:36:45all the fun i can't tell you how many times i've been to like a shoe store and i see like one of those
00:36:50light up la gear shoes and like you guys have this in a 12 and they're like no yeah wheelies we have
00:36:55them in four size four wheelies would be so sick i i yeah i've never had any special ops any special
00:37:03ops applications with the wheelies that would be sick i don't think so let's get on it dude a guy from
00:37:09the uk ran a marathon in wheelies really stop that's cheating though they're not cheating but it was way
00:37:14harder it was infinitely harder like because only the only way that it's better is if it's mostly
00:37:19downhill right and he only wheelied for very small parts of it and like if you think about how you have
00:37:26to run you have to run right on the forefront or else you've just it's basically unstable don't they
00:37:31retracted i thought they retracted somehow i you know the technology of the wheelie
00:37:35you can't even talk about
00:37:41that's classified what is everyone doing though like like that's a cool thing i just did a navy
00:37:46seals podcast yesterday sean johnson the security guy for joe rogan or whatever and he's a great guy
00:37:51good and he was like yeah i guess before us ran 500 miles uh or he ran on psilocybin on psilocybin
00:37:57i go why didn't you what are we doing now now it's not a oh you hear about david gogg he's going
00:38:02a guy ran a fucking tongue and he goes yeah but this guy run a ton on drugs and you go okay and then
00:38:07now this guy's running a ton with wheelies what's everyone up to uh did you see pushing the envelope
00:38:12man what is going on here having sex you go holy bring him in i mean dude imagine because you know
00:38:18everyone's loved ones you do a marathon everyone's like family and friends are watching just they're all
00:38:23usually pretty yeah you just that one glide it's cheating though just kill me then just let me go
00:38:27out suicide it's a peak moment it's like no one gives you water they're like actually yeah
00:38:33uh nims purger yeah passed away you know that guy he was the the uh best death zone mountaineer on
00:38:42the planet yeah and uh he had the netflix documentary did did my show did rogan show and uh he passed away
00:38:50just doing some mountaineering stuff like he was a uh not gurkha what's the yeah he's a gurkha well
00:38:57he was but then he eventually went into yeah so he's like british special forces sas oh well uh and
00:39:02then i mean he did these ascents and descents without oxygen like the most gnarly
00:39:08shit like oh we're at the top of everest and some guy needs oxygen and we don't have any i'll just
00:39:12give him mine and i'll just go down normally uh and yeah he he that was he did it yeah so this
00:39:19whole party was knocked out 10 guys psilocybin you know that might have actually been the thing that
00:39:24could have fixed it wait maybe he could do that with wheelies we could talk to everest's wheelies
00:39:29is actually harder like the first guy to summit everest without legs just happened oh jesus christ
00:39:35this is what i'm talking about no that's so impressive what do you do get the video just have
00:39:39a regular life but he's trying to he's got no legs i know also on everest you don't need to be up there
00:39:46he needs to get up there on everest apparently giant sheets of ice will just flip off and they
00:39:50could crush that whole base camp if you and your partner sleep best at different temperatures it
00:39:54is time that you joined us in the modern world and got an eight sleep i've always wanted to try
00:39:58eight sleep uh which side of the bed you prefer i usually take left but i am flexible you're not
00:40:03sleeping in my bed mate oh when you said partner i just assumed i meant a romantic partner you know
00:40:10of course eight sleeps pod five is a smart mattress cover that actively cools or heats each side of
00:40:15the bed by up to 20 degrees so if you run hot and your partner runs cold you're both happy so hypothetically
00:40:20if your bro was sleeping over what side of the bed would you prefer i'm not 12. there are no sleepovers
00:40:27okay best of all it's got upgraded sensors that run health checks while you're asleep tracking things
00:40:32like abnormal heartbeats or sudden hrv changes what if i just slept at the end of your bed like a dog
00:40:38did your wife kick you out again she did fine okay yes pod five it cools it heats it elevates and
00:40:46it's clinically proven to give you up to one hour more of quality sleep every night and if you're still
00:40:51on the fence they have a 30-day sleep trial plus they ship internationally right now you can get up to
00:40:56350 off the pod five by going to the link in the description below or heading to 8sleep.com modern
00:41:01wisdom and using the code modern wisdom at checkout that's e-i-g-h-t sleep.com modern wisdom and
00:41:07modern wisdom at checkout there's a documentary about uh the nepal earthquake that happened and it was
00:41:14during everest climbing season and i think there's one and then there's maybe an aftershock and another
00:41:18one and it is insane because most of everest is the kind of valley it's not actually it doesn't look
00:41:24that much like a mountain it's just this sort of big valley thing in between a ton of other peaks
00:41:29and you keep going up and there's base camp one two three four and then there's this special pass
00:41:33that's like a big off ravine and you realize even from going up to coming back down
00:41:38changes all the time glacier's moving if you like far too loud moves up there and a big earthquake that
00:41:46flattened half of katmandu like that goes and there's videos of just the gnarliest avalanche you've ever
00:41:54seen in your life yeah god's just looking at us going what are they doing stay down the hell's
00:41:58in the water with the dolphins yeah you can't breathe he's still climbing around up there god
00:42:04damn it like what are we doing there was a documentary on netflix about this guy look at
00:42:08him yeah man with no legs makes history by climbing mount everest using only his arms also maybe play
00:42:13maybe in the headline put his name don't call him man look at that i see that's what that's what you
00:42:19should be doing man 34th birthday up there no store for cake former russian paratrooper lost both
00:42:27of his legs in 2015 and they drone that cake in colson it is difficult is that ai cake what's going on
00:42:34here dude apparently so that that guy john krakauer who had the whole into thin air thing he wrote that
00:42:40book being like nobody should do this it's so dangerous you can die and uh he said like you know
00:42:45years after it published the what do they get the the guides called like your what are those who's
00:42:49called sure we're like dude we can't thank you enough man like thousands more thousands of people
00:42:55come like he made the industry when he did it he was maybe 450 people climbed everest like 10 years
00:43:00later after the book it was like 33 000 people so everyone started they were like if that guy can
00:43:05fucking do it i can do it that's what he said people will meet him people meet him and be like
00:43:08if you can do well now all these guys with legs are gonna be like yeah this is yeah this is a piece
00:43:12of got two legs you need to lose one leg but two legs and one arm and then i can do it and try
00:43:17and beat the record i got two legs and no cake i'm gonna be whipping up there
00:43:23i don't know like i watched a documentary on netflix where they were talking about this terrible
00:43:27avalanche that you know um you know crushed a lot of people and it was a pretty heavy documentary
00:43:32but they were talking about just working at the camp setting up before the terrible thing happened
00:43:37in the story of or in the documentary and they were like yeah we'd we'd have to wake up every
00:43:41morning to that time of season and go set off explosions they would cause little avalanches
00:43:46just so that the people could be living there and i'm like why is yeah you're you're already playing
00:43:52with fire if you live in an environment where men and women have to wake up at 6 a.m and go set off
00:43:57explosions to do like you're already you're already in the lion's den you're on the edge a little
00:44:01what are we doing do you is the if you go to do in the snow which military subdivision gets sent
00:44:09to go and do that snow everybody trains for the army and the marine corps and special operations
00:44:13everyone trains to do snow snow work right yeah and the same for desert and the same food yeah
00:44:18and you know there's some geographical kind of destinations that are a little bit more
00:44:23more obvious for some units you know if you're deploying over to europe you're probably gonna do
00:44:27more snow work than if you're deploying to south america you know so you kind of figure that out that way
00:44:32it's pretty cool what's your favorite element or least favorite element uh
00:44:38man i like kind of like them all they're all they're all a little bit different you know um
00:44:44but growing when i was growing up you know as a kid in new england and like i thought i was gonna be
00:44:48fighting in you know the i thought i was gonna be fighting in vietnam but i ended up fighting in the in
00:44:53the desert and in a city environment so i guess i'm kind of like you went from humid jungle to open urban
00:45:00sand yeah yeah or city you know the city environment but they all have their own little
00:45:06unique challenges and it's always interesting and you got to get good at each particular one
00:45:11and i would i always say i'd rather be cold than too too hot but the woods that's so main right the
00:45:18woods yeah yeah bigfoot you might be the guy oh yes right you're a bigfoot guy huh well i'm just
00:45:22saying let's get you let's get you in the woods back to where you know you know you said you like all
00:45:27the area and then let's get you to kill one of these you're the guy could be
00:45:32why not man i don't know did you ever research igloos about like how much they they apparently
00:45:38they're like they can take snow can trap heat at like an unbelievable level really oh yeah dude
00:45:44like i've never once looked up igloos in my life you've never been to a children's museum well like
00:45:49when i was in kindergarten it's like a b c d and then when it gets to i there's a picture of a
00:45:53fucking igloo that's all i know about it look into igloos make some make that your next drunk
00:45:58museum that's the problem it's just big foot and cigars i've grown up a lot what can igloos do
00:46:07they just trap like an unbelievable amount of heat like wait it's a bit of ice they're not made
00:46:11of snow right now you're me up i i mean blocks of ice they're like blocks of snowish ice yeah
00:46:17snowball snow what's that called there's a snow that doesn't pack yeah it's compactable snow all
00:46:22right okay cool snow ice hybrid good good in your defense you said you never looked it up that's
00:46:27true i've never heard the same i just looked up i just read a placard at one kid's museum and i was
00:46:32like whoa it was like 400 it's like 400 of heat or some something surprising well there's a if you
00:46:38fall in water in like snowy environment you're supposed to take all your clothes off and then roll
00:46:41in snow right yeah so you'll die quicker they go let's just end this just roll around in the snow
00:46:50is that you get back in the water and drown yourself well you definitely have to take your clothes off
00:46:53you definitely yeah you don't want my clothes if you're wet yeah you want to get dry i'm pretty sure
00:46:57that the snow is like absorbent because it's not it'll help to get some of the water off you roll
00:47:02around in the snow i'd also i'd be a snow leopard in the winter if i took all my clothes off you would
00:47:06not be able to see me at all i'd be completely captured you wouldn't see me at all i'm for real
00:47:14like i my wife laughs because i actually did tan the summer but i'll like walk to the shower and it
00:47:18looks like i'm wearing shorts that's cool my like my ass is so white it's crazy it's pretty cool it's
00:47:25pretty awesome honestly now i've never thought about how well i got a thing to an arctic environment
00:47:30no clothes i'm wearing clothes it's great it's actually kind of i mean yeah i would show you guys
00:47:35but it'd be weird but my ass is i mean dude yeah thank you because i've been in the condo for the
00:47:42mothership so like i'm on the 20th floor and it's just all windows i don't want to fuss with all the
00:47:47things so i just kind of been walking around like you know just yeah if i'm going to the shower i'm
00:47:52kind of like i'm whatever but for you they would see it from a distance and go he's one of what can you
00:47:57also if you're that high up i if you're like in you know something like a hotel in new york if you're in a
00:48:02high window environment with a bunch of other windows if someone sees you naked that's kind of
00:48:06on them really yeah i don't know if you're certain if you're up high enough it's like i'm not when i
00:48:11still think about it like i don't think that that i don't think it was going to be that interested
00:48:14i think they'd go it's okay naked anything iron like that's not much that's not true did you ever
00:48:19see a naked person through a window well if they're having sex or doing something then i would be
00:48:22excited but just a guy in the kitchen eating a chewy granola bar you know i i would i would no matter
00:48:29what i would stare i would stare for like 30 minutes it's fucking naked guy it's just crazy
00:48:34we don't watch some old guy just watch tv because we could see him i guess yeah him watch it it's an
00:48:40old naked man i would i would sit there he'd have to move i wouldn't budge i would just watch him
00:48:44that's great it's a novel you never see you don't you get arrested for that you know right no not if
00:48:48we're both 20 feet up in the air what's the floor 20 feet what's the what's the floor above which it's not
00:48:54weird because it's if it's ground floor that's kind of ground floor is crazy yeah but so first
00:48:59floor is probably also not great yeah you know yeah but i can only get to her window on the first
00:49:03floor you know like do you know what i'm saying i've never been higher
00:49:10so how am i supposed to do this double i would say double digits double did it double
00:49:14digit floors is international so if you've got a belgian malinois it might be able to jump high
00:49:18enough to say it himself he can watch whatever he wants dude no dog laws that's true double i remember
00:49:23one time when i lived in philadelphia i could hear like my neighbors all the time and i thought they
00:49:28were having sex and i was like oh my god i could hear them through the wall and i was all excited i'm
00:49:32like getting all hard like this is awesome and then i just realized they're like i was just like about
00:49:37to beat off and then i felt the beat off and then i realized they were just fighting and i was like
00:49:43ah well it's also kind of hot now i feel like a creep i could have mom and dad it reminds me of
00:49:49mama dead you know i'm arguing you know yeah they could have made up actually that must happen all
00:49:55the time in new york because you're just so on top of each other like at all times everybody
00:50:00yeah facing windows facing you living like no one's got special tinted windows all these buildings are
00:50:04100 years old yeah it's got to happen all the time i would imagine although i'm looking for it i'm
00:50:09up there sometimes no tell i don't i'm i'm only just scouting well that's what i'm saying sometimes
00:50:14the view of my room is just someone else's room like yeah so that's that's what i'm always thinking
00:50:18about like in my house i don't think about what i'm wearing but i've thought about it all week yeah
00:50:23like people are looking in here does is it uh orlando airport that's got that huge hotel that's like
00:50:31right in the i swear it's orlando really it's one of this florida florida airport that's got it
00:50:37the main tsa checkpoint is just floor to ceiling rooms so it's like built hotels really into the
00:50:44terminal hotel new york has one of those and i always think like these they're just straight
00:50:50up windows overlooking tsa so there is the potential for somebody who's like while they're
00:50:55getting frisked down to just lock up and you're just mourning glory opening that's wild yeah that's
00:51:00good that's pretty awesome so i want to spend my time i was watching people get frisked all day
00:51:05it's a power move i love security i just have knives jacks my penis like you wish you could do
00:51:11this right now uh how how is sobriety going i know that this has been great big pivot for you
00:51:18how long has it been uh two years and nine months what was there like a straw that broke the camel's
00:51:22back um like some children's event that you went to you finally got kicked out of now stop saying
00:51:27child no uh nothing that stands out i mean getting arrested and crashing my car and fighting some
00:51:35cops that that part it was that yeah it was a big dramatic thing it was a huge it was a huge
00:51:40embarrassing how'd the fight go terrible for me those boys can fight yeah i was a little you know it was a
00:51:47a little blurry for me if i'm honest so you're drunk got in a fight and that was it for you you said no
00:51:52more yeah because i mean like also like i had been thinking uh i should be giving up the bottle for
00:51:59a long time like it's in your mind you're going uh maybe because drinking is great and drinking is
00:52:03fun until it's until you get sad or until you you know still something bad happens or till so drinking
00:52:09has a lot of positive experiences but it was it was time to time to wrap it up but it's been great and i
00:52:14in my act i always joke about all the negatives of sobriety but the truth is like it's fantastic and
00:52:18i'm very happy i did it unreal yeah that's been great thanks hey what took its place um well i do
00:52:25work out way more now which is even if it's like a crappy workout i'm just kind of proud of myself for
00:52:30going like and then that gives me like a little rush of like we did it today we're in here you know
00:52:34we're we're doing that and then i do smoke a shit ton of cigars and um yeah those are the main
00:52:41things what did you do drugs too when you were drinking yeah i was doing a lot of pills with
00:52:44the drinking you know because then i could stay awake all my friends would do like
00:52:48you know cocaine or whatever and then like i would be passing out from the alcohol is this funny
00:52:56you're a comedian right i know i love it
00:52:59what's the coolest guy knows just laughing at me this dude he couldn't even it's a great follow-up
00:53:03question too yeah so it was like adderall and stuff yeah because um i would like pass out from
00:53:08drinking like at my house because i got a bunch of people over but i would hear them having fun
00:53:13downstairs and i'm like dude i'm missing out on the party yeah so then yeah you just start popping pills
00:53:17and doing whatever to try to keep uh keep drinking i've never done adderall what's it feel like oh like
00:53:22cocaine it's the same right it is yeah i can't have it like it's not i can't have it it doesn't help me
00:53:28study i tried it in college i was in a library i started just chatting with everybody and then i i took it
00:53:34i took it while drinking i got kicked out of a beastie boys concert and then i snuck back what
00:53:39did you do to get kicked out of a beastie boys concert what oh it's impressive yeah well it was
00:53:42actually so for some reason whenever i take adderall and i've only ever taken a handful of times while
00:53:46drinking i get it in my head that like i have way more capabilities than i do so i was sitting there
00:53:52and i'm like i'm just like i was on this i remember my friends had ground floor tickets i had
00:53:57tickets of like this like you know not a balcony but it was like i was here and the floor was here
00:54:02but it was like a eight foot or whatever six or seven foot drop and then i could climb back up and
00:54:06get on the floor and i was like if if i look here all the security guards if i time it where all their
00:54:11backs are turned jump and jump up i'll disappear into the crowd no problem no problem limitless dude
00:54:17yeah literally i jumped down finally and i went to jump into the crowd hoping like to dissolve into this
00:54:23the crowd just completely parked around me i get tackled by two security guards they knocked one of
00:54:28my shoes off so i'm walking out with one shoe i go out and i'm like man fuck this is bullshit and i
00:54:34like just kick my other shoe off and i saw like this they had the chain link fence where people smoke
00:54:39i just kind of found a gap in that went in went back in and then i they saw my friend who actually
00:54:44backed in that he used to look like me so they were this is really shitty of me but they were kicking
00:54:47him out mistaken identity that kindness was like that sucks i kept going the guy goes saw the fact
00:54:54that i had no shoes on it was like it's actually him so then he goes back i get kicked out again
00:55:00and then they were doing an aramark working like a shift worker thing so when the people were changing
00:55:04shifts for the aramark employees i got in line with the aramark employees again still my socks walked in
00:55:10and then i walked under the bleachers i was near like dressing rooms and stuff
00:55:13walked under the bleachers crawled up and i found a gap between the bleachers and there's just people
00:55:17like it went seats and my face just like came out and i just watched the concert next to them and then
00:55:24i walked all the way back from south philly to west philly so adderall yeah not good for me yeah not
00:55:30a good i can't do it it sounds great it was pretty awesome why everyone isn't doing it adderall's great
00:55:34when you have ocd too because you just like organize a sock drawer you never looked at in your life
00:55:39yeah i don't i give myself the worst missions possible yeah i just i do them though i get
00:55:43them done but they're not they're not like a new hour of material in adderall it's all useless the
00:55:47next day i'm like none of this is funny he was so enthusiastic about it yeah it was very organized
00:55:52like that's gonna be good i've heard adderall is like anti-comedy like people who have like i've done
00:55:57stand up on adderall it's just apparently it's just a different wavelength it just doesn't translate
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00:56:56did you get through the full like alcohol withdrawals and everything yeah actually it's kind of funny i
00:57:01thought that i had covid i'm like ah just my luck man i get arrested and then i get out and now i got
00:57:09cold and then uh my doctor he's like no dude this is alcohol withdrawal and i was like oh that's a
00:57:15real thing huh and he goes yeah and so yeah it was uh it was it was a rough week but yeah that's like the
00:57:20one thing you can't quit cold turkey yeah yeah or you can but you you can kill you can die oh really
00:57:26yeah down the rabbit hole that and xanax really yeah you can die from xanax withdrawal too well
00:57:31actually i will admit i've never said this before but so when i got out of jail i did start drinking
00:57:36again i was like having beers and making light of it and then we're not making light of it but
00:57:41how long were you in jail for uh a couple days waiting for a judge basically but the um when i got
00:57:48out i was like okay no one found out you know because i thought to myself while i was in jail
00:57:51without my phone like either everyone's talking about it or no one cares and no one knows and and
00:57:56they just think that i'm not answering my texts so when i got out i realized no one noticed but then
00:58:02uh like so then i started drinking again i went back to my softball team told some of my close friends
00:58:06about it but then like once it got public like once everyone started dragging me on the internet and
00:58:10making fun of me then i was like all right and i guess i need to do some work you know like i need to
00:58:15figure out if this is so that the humiliation of everyone knowing about what happened is what made
00:58:20me take it serious yeah i wrote a book called extreme ownership which is about like taking ownership of
00:58:24what's going on it seemed like another move could have just been like own it like hell yeah dude it was
00:58:28a good i know yeah you're like you're a comedian right right you're like hey yeah dude yeah i go hard
00:58:35yeah who's with me yeah well but also but my commitment to truth made me go this is a problem
00:58:42okay yeah like because normally i will just own you know any of my thoughts or opinions i don't really
00:58:47care what people think about those kind of things but i knew deep down like this is a problem you're
00:58:52using this as a the social pressure was the big kicker as well yeah interesting yeah i came off a
00:58:5850 cent per day moped in bali 10 years ago and brakes go out from underneath me as i'm trying to
00:59:04avoid some truck land on the balinese tarmac all of this side of my arm is gone all the outside of my
00:59:12foot is gone like just the left hand side of my body had no skin left on it but nothing broken
00:59:17and my first sensation i'm in the middle of the road there's still balinese people are
00:59:20fucking idiot tourists again here we go like classic stuff my first sensation wasn't like fear for my
00:59:25life am i okay health concern it was like i look like such a prick embarrassment my main concern of
00:59:31mortal fear that's yeah embarrassment yeah that was it yeah damn that's why like that's true like
00:59:38like i always say like uh with things like that you'll probably notice it the next day more like
00:59:43when you're thinking you're going oh this kind of hurts like because in that moment you're just going
00:59:47i got a freaking figure that adrenaline kicks in and yeah i'm trying to walk cool trying to walk away
00:59:52from the scene cool went to a beach club continued on to a beach club with these two aussie guys that
00:59:57were traveling says i don't want to look like i'm not too cool one of them's like i'm medical trained
01:00:00i'm sure it'll be fine go to a beach club he's got like alcohol swabs doing that like have you ever had
01:00:05alcohol like a proper open like good bit of it hurts so bad i thought that i knew what the ceiling of
01:00:13like communication was that my nerves could could give to me and it just blew straight through i could hear it
01:00:21i was like i can hear the i started laughing it was so painful i was like this is absurd how
01:00:26painful it is that someone just took the dial and like cranked it up to 100. yeah i had a uh ear
01:00:32infection when i was younger and i remember i feel like they used to dump like hydrogen peroxide
01:00:36yeah they used to do that and it bubbles yeah so i saw the bottle and rubbing alcohol was the same
01:00:41shaped bottle and i was like i think this is the that my mom pours in my hair and i dumped rubbing
01:00:45alcohol into an ear infection i cried it hurt so bad it was probably to my knees it hurt i heard
01:00:51kidney stones are the worst though but kidney stones i've seen guys go down piss kidney stones
01:00:56what are they like you get some kind of build up yeah kidneys and it has to come out it's like
01:01:00pissing a rock out but it's like a rock oh it happens to a lot of people too by the way it's like
01:01:03birthing a little infection it's worse than childbirth trust me no trust but no trust me i know well it's
01:01:12interesting you say that because we got i didn't know whether or not i was going to do this we also
01:01:16have hunter biden on the podcast on monday which is going to be hilarious so it's either today we're
01:01:20going to do it today i'm going to offer it to hunter biden we have period cramp simulators here
01:01:26this is some sort of feminist propaganda isn't it this is because of your wnba yeah i know it can
01:01:31stay it can stay over there we're going to do it even know it's like some electronic thing but we
01:01:36gave it to one of them no we gave it to one of the i'm gonna have to do it before monday if i'm
01:01:40gonna get hunter biden to do it yeah yeah um we gave it to one of the guys and he said i'm gonna test it
01:01:44on my arm and he had uh he had his wedding ring on his wedding ring immediately started heating up
01:01:50and he wasn't able to like close his hand for like a couple of hours like nick couldn't feel his
01:01:55fucking off you did you you ingest it or you inject it it no it's like a it's one of those kind of like
01:01:59an ab machine like an electric thing got it got it and it's supposed to simulate you immediately start
01:02:05once watching sex in the city yeah immediately order stuff off of amazon my first kid my wife was
01:02:12pregnant with my with our first kid and i went to the class where you're gonna go through like the
01:02:17birthing stuff and and so i'm in there and you know i'm you know being mr supportive dude whatever and you
01:02:24know where the woman's teaching this breathing and stuff and telling me what to do and like
01:02:27and she's like you're gonna be in a lot of pain and i and i said you know what what's the pain from
01:02:33and you know just kind of you know i'd gone through like combat trauma and all that kind of what's the
01:02:36pain from and the woman's like you'll never know and i go no no i'm not saying i'll know but like
01:02:41just what's causing the pain she's like you don't understand what it's like i'm like okay
01:02:45it's okay it's all good i'll just sit here and be quiet yeah that's you told also i would pay any money to
01:02:50see you in like one of those classes yeah you just watch there's only one i only went to one and i was
01:02:55like hey i'm not i'm not welcome there by that woman you're like i have access to empathy can you
01:03:00please explain something what's briefly there is a short window that this special operator is actually
01:03:06able to feel feelings i'm desperately trying to understand what the love of my life is going to go
01:03:11through oh okay i tried emotions once and it didn't go well it was you both in class you got you're on one
01:03:16dude they're shitty when you're like the guy in the hospital they're like really shitty towards you
01:03:20i remember we were like uh i was with my wife and we had like hours and hours and hours and i i was
01:03:25like kind of point man i would run home do stuff for like the dogs come back during later yeah we had
01:03:29like we had plenty of time and i was like and they were scheduling a c-section i was like all right what
01:03:32time are you doing this because i have to let the dogs out but i was just like do i have hours or
01:03:36should i stay here and they were like what literally she goes what do you have somewhere else to be and i was like
01:03:41is this going to happen right away like what's the move here and then she was just a piece i felt like
01:03:46a piece of for even asking like hey just i got to do all this other too like yeah you know it was
01:03:50my responsibility to still do we couldn't get someone to watch the dogs yeah so i was like i'll
01:03:54the dogs if we're doing it right now but if we do have three or four hours i can let the dogs starve
01:03:59yeah like what the and the lady you would have thought i i'd been like yeah all right we'll hurry the
01:04:03up i was just like just curious i wasn't in a rush i was like trying to help they they're shitty
01:04:08towards you that sucks i i think the reason for that is it's obvious the price that chicks pay when
01:04:14they go through labor and any guy that isn't like completely attuned to that just is seen as callous
01:04:21or flippant or not caring like you know you desperately trying to understand hey please explain to me where
01:04:27this is coming from hey we also have these fur babies at home and it would be really nice if we
01:04:32made sure that they didn't starve over the next day we had been there for a day and a half so it wasn't
01:04:37like we had just gotten there we had been there we're you know we're doing all this stuff she was
01:04:40guessing we'd be like yeah lots of places it's been a day and a half i was like i just want
01:04:44to know if i can i can't i'm asking you completely you would have thought it was insane and the
01:04:49worst part too is like for the c-section like they dress you in scrubs so like they like took her
01:04:56back you work there well they took her they took her back and they're just like here put this
01:04:59shit on and i'm like fucking like okay i'm like crying i'm like i'm like trying to put on my then
01:05:04i'm just like in the hallway dressed up like a nurse just like where do i go yeah get back there
01:05:08i'm like all right sorry guys you never feel like more of a boob than when your wife you know has a
01:05:14kid it's true you're like they really they get someone should do something about it you gotta sleep
01:05:18on a shitty couch the whole time yeah and there's really no you add nothing to the you did literally
01:05:24nothing oh god you're you're just nothing like everything you say is wrong it's just it's just
01:05:30just stand there you know i want to know what your bachelor party looked like what does jocko's
01:05:36bachelor party look like i don't think i i don't even have one no bachelor party yeah i mean my wife
01:05:42and i got married in the san diego courthouse you know like on a thursday afternoon i was wearing a
01:05:47t-shirt and a and a pair of surf shorts and flip-flops and went down got married a minimum viable
01:05:51wedding who was your best man uh i didn't have a best man there just like my platoon chief came
01:05:56down and was like do you have to bring a witness so i was like hey chief and he's like yep so he's
01:06:00went down there and got it done sorry sorry sorry referring to your wedding just went down there and
01:06:07got it done yeah in and out it's really crazy we've been married for like almost 30 years yeah you
01:06:17know yeah it's like unreal we need this ceremony yeah yeah yeah who needs flowers yeah me and my wife
01:06:23actually did it during covet same thing we got a packet of papers from city hall if pennsylvania
01:06:28is like a quaker state technically so we did it's called a quaker ceremony where you just get the
01:06:33packets from the city hall bring it home you sign it you have to give it like 48 hours and then
01:06:38like your neighbor can come witness and sign and then you're good to go yeah would you give it 48
01:06:42that was fun like to let it cool yeah let it cool out yeah it doesn't just you know sober up it's not
01:06:46vegas you know what i mean you gotta we did do we went to england and did we i don't know what i
01:06:52don't know if there's an official thing but they called it a blessing where we did like a a marriage
01:06:55thing in england where we pretended like we were getting married even though we were already married
01:06:59yeah and everyone knew that we dressed up and yeah we dressed up and all that stuff it's like the
01:07:03ceremonial way yeah like a ceremonial way in exactly we did the ceremony even though my wife was pregnant
01:07:07at the time you know which was same thing yeah we did that we had a party afterwards and she was
01:07:12pregnant for it yeah tier one ceremonial wedding yeah yeah you are tier one we're both here that's how
01:07:17you do it you go handle it and then we did we did the dog and pony show for the civilians
01:07:23there you go let's say it was the same exact thing she was very she was pretty pregnant for the
01:07:26wedding yeah yeah my wife was like kind of pregnant for the way you could tell i could tell you can tell
01:07:31them the pictures you're kind of like oh good to go oh there we go yeah uh has dating changed since
01:07:40you've stopped drinking yeah it sucks now yeah why is it the women got uglier for you yeah who's this
01:07:48what's her name uh yeah that is way harder because like drinking was is the easiest thing you want to
01:07:55get drinks hey you want to go like it's just the way and now like you don't go to a coffee shop and
01:07:59both get nervous in front of each other exactly that's what it feels like like i literally i've
01:08:04been hanging out with this this woman who i really like and she's like i literally texted her because
01:08:08it was just not going well in the text you know she's she's a girl i know from comedy and and i was
01:08:14like hey i think you're really attractive and you're nice to me like would you like to go out like i just
01:08:19had to eventually like just be saying the things yeah because i couldn't just be like we're getting
01:08:23drinks after comedy and then we would have like flirted there and then that would have went whatever way it
01:08:27would have went it's like love on the spectrum right away i'd like to see you it feels exactly
01:08:31like that yeah and then we watch anime and drink down and do for dinner you're saying sober dating
01:08:36is like love on the spectrum it is okay hard it's not going well what do you think would happen if
01:08:41the love on the spectrum was done with booze then would that just turn normal what do you mean
01:08:46like if you're saying you got them drunk yeah i think they can drink can't they they can
01:08:52they can oh yeah and they can order drinks that would be yes you know we just if it's not spicy
01:08:58enough already we can just like throw a little bit of booze turns into love island get his ad roll
01:09:01dealer through yeah yeah spike in the drinks they go we didn't even know what's gonna yeah it would
01:09:06devolve i think yeah i think that's like that's like a very heartwarming pure show i don't like it
01:09:11i talk trash about it all the time why oh multiple reasons it's you know what's the number one complaint
01:09:16well they don't pay him first of all two everyone's watching it like we're watching children dating
01:09:20they go isn't it cute it's very condescending to look at grown-ups and be like oh they're dating
01:09:25like we do and like i hope i wish for the best it's very all my my biggest problem with it is it's
01:09:30called love on the spectrum but they don't respect the spectrum they'll pick some guy who's super high
01:09:35functioning and pair him with some girl who's super not high functioning and be like maybe this is a match
01:09:40and then they're on the date and he's like i think you're great i think you're wonderful and i think
01:09:43you're awesome and i think you're pretty what about me and then she's like oh handsome you're like that's
01:09:48not a perfect that's perfect no it's not perfect but my point is i don't like it i think everything
01:09:56everything they're doing is like too exploitive i don't i don't think it's good i was so ready to
01:10:00push back i thought it was going to be a really judgmental take from you and it's like it's really
01:10:03convincing yeah well it's actually kind of convincing it's so here's the thing you've seen them with
01:10:07celebrity now now they like think they're famous the one famous couple already broke up she's on like
01:10:12everything now it's just it's too much yeah that's fair although it's so sweet though like you're
01:10:17seeing them they're with their parents and like they're like this never would have happened
01:10:21i don't know i watch that he's doing the exact same thing you just said that's what i'm saying
01:10:24but it's so put yourself on report bro dude they're living the dream dude they're already fine
01:10:30leave them alone they don't need a wife and kids frustrated they're so frustrated what uh oh here's
01:10:36another a part of it that that is is like they have a diagnosis right that that they don't like bright
01:10:42lights and loud noises the the high pressure situations make them buzz and then we're like how
01:10:47about uh how about we put a 10 camera shoot on netflix how about we keep interrupting them every
01:10:52five minutes on a fucking first date you're like leave them alone if you want them to date that's fine
01:10:57but maybe don't exploit them on a television show you're not paying them it's crazy yeah no money james has
01:11:02that james you know james right uh which one is the guy who goes sword guy renaissance fair i like that
01:11:06guy he's got liquid he's got i've seen every episode and i'm rooting for them as humans i'm saying
01:11:11that when you watch the show it feels a little icky but what about you got to push past that he's
01:11:14doing great he's got he's got he's got liquid death sponsorship that is the most human answer i've
01:11:23ever heard what a great moment he's got a liquid that's gotta push back past that listen he's got swords
01:11:30liquid death he's got a liquid death sponsorship i i tried watched try started watching an episode
01:11:35and i kind of i didn't you articulated what i kind of felt when i was watching i was like this
01:11:39is just i didn't feel good about myself watching i watched like five minutes i'm like okay this is
01:11:43enough of this if you've ever saw a 40 year old dating another third like 45 year old or whatever
01:11:48and you go isn't it cute it's like don't talk to them like that they're not retarded these are
01:11:52these are these are these are grown-ups with autism like treat them like adults i'll be honest
01:11:56you would never go to someone's table and go are you two having a good time this is i really support
01:12:02this you're like get the hell out of here like it's it's mean they're they're adults yeah i watch
01:12:07it and i laugh the entire time yeah and then i cry they get me every time i like their directness
01:12:12but that's just autism that has nothing to do with it it's so funny yeah i also think that's what's
01:12:16going on inside of every single person dating it just doesn't come out the same way yeah oh the same
01:12:21thing the people in love on us on the spectrum don't have the filter that everybody else exactly
01:12:26yeah and i like that point but i like that about autism i don't need them to be on a dating show to
01:12:30appreciate that about what would be great would be a love on the spectrum love island crossover episode
01:12:35that's what i'm saying yeah like 50 50 to just throw a couple of grenades would this be on epstein's
01:12:42island or what dude this sounds really great try to figure it out you know it's very it's like trader
01:12:48or whatever and it's like trying to work out which but you don't know love on the spectrum yeah
01:12:54and you're trying to work out to be fair has got which once you got people who are that hot
01:13:00you throw some autism in there it's not you know mentally you're in like thin air
01:13:05i gotta push past it liquid death sponsorship's just waiting on the other side just hot chicks
01:13:12being like you're like really funny yeah you know a lot about weapons
01:13:21never knew that about medieval times
01:13:25well i just think also i mean it's just i think that we've got this idea of like rom-coms and then
01:13:30that's what a relationship is which i don't believe in and so like to push that on autistic people on
01:13:36the show because they're looking for some sort of like notebook like thing i just i just feels like
01:13:41very fraudulent yeah tell me if this sounds familiar you train regularly you eat reasonably
01:13:47well you feel fine but you're just kind of going off vibes most people have absolutely no idea what's
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01:14:37functionhealth.com slash modern wisdom that's functionhealth.com slash modern wisdom how do you view
01:14:42relationships you are you no romance or like how do you how do you think about romanticism basically
01:14:47uh i don't even know how to answer that i don't know like everyone else i'd like to find a partner
01:14:52i think it's good i think it's healthy yeah but you're both married with kids what advice have you
01:14:56got for jeff on how to find a good woman how old are you 43 should have probably figured it out by now
01:15:03well behind the power curve as they say one of those late bloomers
01:15:08do you uh where do you find you know where are you dating where you where you find your girls like
01:15:13apparently you found one from the comedy scene yeah i mean uh and you sent her weird autistic messages
01:15:18already you were saying i like i like the way he summarizes my life like where jeff gets arrested for
01:15:27going to kids things it's just it's so direct there's no fat on it when he talks about my life
01:15:35what you met a girl in comedy when you sent her autistic text messages is that where you're getting
01:15:39them jeff military precision use your power exactly would you find some weakling that you could pick
01:15:47from the pack um so you know i usually just meet women on instagram from like after comedy shows and
01:15:54things that is a thing apparently though what the girls after the shows yeah or that you meet them at
01:16:00the like after because now you know that they're interested in you because they saw kind of what
01:16:03you're about up there they listen to you talk for 70 minutes and they go you know they're interested
01:16:09um and then you can kind of figure it out from there and usually the comics go somewhere after the
01:16:13clubs and all that stuff it's not i wouldn't recommend it it hasn't worked out for me as far as
01:16:16anything i've had some some i also think you don't get things you don't believe in and i've been
01:16:21somewhat skeptical of relationships and romance in general so um so maybe how does the skepticism of
01:16:28romance and relationship show um what do you mean i don't know what that means like you think that
01:16:35they're a psyop like that jocko's not actually married or that matt's like no no no no i think
01:16:39it's fantastic i think that if you um love someone enough you got to kind of like compromise a lot of
01:16:47stuff that's what being a man is you kind of compromise things you say hey i can't go have
01:16:53fun and be drunk guy and i can't be going doing this and if i'm going to be on the road i need to
01:16:56kind of think about how long i'm going to be on the road whereas i'm making all the decisions for my
01:17:00career so i can have more money and more friend time and things like that i've made a lot of selfish
01:17:04decisions that wouldn't it's like why i don't have a dog i love dogs i can't think of anything i like
01:17:08more but if i was to have a dog right now i'd be a very selfish dog owner just letting him be at my
01:17:13house while i'm gone forever and so the same thing is just kind of true with relationships i
01:17:16would love to be with a partner who's awesome who i love and i really believe in it you want a crater
01:17:22it's just that right now well it's just right now it's like i don't know how i'd be a good boyfriend
01:17:26and i'll figure it out and i'll make sacrifices but i haven't found anybody worth making that sacrifice
01:17:31for that's all i'm sure someone will come around and i'll be like holy shit no okay i'll take this
01:17:37weekend off let's go to mexico i mean i've done it before you meet someone you'll dolphin ride
01:17:43the chick that we rode dolphins and i got an ectopic pregnancy with yeah do you get lonely
01:17:48when you're sitting there yeah we're all lonely i'm super lonely i don't think that has to do with
01:17:52single guy i think i've got i got a theory that single guys after 7 p.m in the house go completely
01:17:57insane absolutely well you nailed it there is nothing that single guys in the house can do between
01:18:05the hours of like 7 p.m and 11 p.m that's great that isn't weird but joe joe sanagato was telling
01:18:10me one of his one of his friends got out of a relationship and started sending him headstand videos
01:18:17it's like are you doing headstands yeah i got into it it's on youtube it's like it's like needy time
01:18:22for bed like doing stuff why are you upside down guys after 7 p.m kind of go a bit insane i think
01:18:28you're right i think it's a hilarious sentence but i think it might be something to it yeah if you're
01:18:33not working and you're not going out partying and doing stuff yeah yeah like oh well i'm gonna start
01:18:37doing like emails at this time i i sadly absolutely need a woman to structure my life otherwise it's just
01:18:44i'm toast i can't do it chicks got so angry at this there was we i've talked about this on the
01:18:48show before and women got really angry i think what they they thought it sounded like was uh guys are
01:18:54unable to have hobbies and like move themselves forward in life on an evening time if they don't
01:19:00have a woman with them i think it's completely different to that i think it's we are domesticated
01:19:04and civilized by women and if left to our own devices do insane stuff sure like that's not yeah
01:19:09like this is how you get obsessed with like crypto or like warhammer 40k and stuff in like
01:19:16you start painting miniatures and collecting wrestling toys yeah which is cool when you have room for it
01:19:22but it's not the sort of thing that you're supposed to do until two in the morning because it's like
01:19:25kind of taken over you yeah it's like you need a woman to go like hey hey it's it's bed i i still
01:19:30need you're up yeah i need to be put to bed seriously yes i need someone to be like bedtime and i'm like
01:19:35fine thank god i swear i'll say i'll say up by myself that's what i do every night last i knew i
01:19:41had to be up for a car service at like six or was six la time eight o'clock here and uh i just watched
01:19:47youtube i watched the first episode of hard knocks and i was like man it i'll just stay away i was like
01:19:52if it's kid mentality of like we can stay up as late as we want yeah no one can tell me otherwise
01:19:56it's like i need someone to tell me otherwise yeah but i don't i'm fine i feel good as a i made my car
01:20:01service as a man who's famously up at 4 30 a.m a lot do you need someone to tell you to go to bed
01:20:07no i mean i'm tired at the end of the day go to bed yeah yeah not that big of a deal i guess um
01:20:13don't say yeah you don't go to bed i'm saying i do what i want he's saying he does what he wants
01:20:18if i want to go to sleep i will go to sleep and if i don't i'll stay up that's why i don't need a gal
01:20:22to go hey honey no offense i need that no i need that man yeah i just don't uh i i would you know
01:20:29civilizing force have you ever had any conflict with the british misses around the fucking no
01:20:37because you're a large it's london time pretty much you're a lot you're a large man i imagine that you
01:20:41rolling out of bed well she she's she sleeps pretty heavily you know and so i just get up and
01:20:49go go about my business could you imagine how much harder your marriage would have been
01:20:53with you up at 4 30 a.m every single day if your wife was a light sleeper oh yeah that would that
01:20:57would be a bummer but you know what you're getting up earlier than here i don't understand the question
01:21:02just getting up early with while my wife is still sleeping so famously wakes up at that that watch
01:21:08has had to oh it's a new one no it's is it the same well it's the same model i got about they
01:21:13re they reproduced them now so nice because of you i don't know probably well apparently you must have
01:21:18how many how many photos have you watched do you think you posted thousands yeah yeah probably
01:21:22thousands of photos and it's always like 4 15 a.m 4 29 a.m so i just picture his wife is as crazy as
01:21:28her him you know she's she's up beforehand yeah yeah i will i've what i've noticed is you have to be up
01:21:36typically if you're living with a woman you should be up before her because if they wake up i've been
01:21:40in a situation where a girl has a job and i don't yes when they wake up for work and you're in bed
01:21:44resent you whoo the huffs and puffs yeah like yeah it's they're real loud slamming oh there's
01:21:51vacuuming that needs to go yeah if you're asleep and they're awake is there something not going on
01:21:56there yeah they're like what the get up why am i up this guy's protecting me and you're just like
01:22:02oh this is the one i chose you have a pillow between your knees
01:22:08yeah oh i remember i would i'm like fake sleeping i'm awake but i'm like i'm not moving just laying
01:22:13the one i picked wearing a razor ramon tank top
01:22:18not they're not a fan you got to get up before them yeah yeah they're putting on like dress clothes
01:22:24and you're just like farting yeah yeah hair's crazy yeah they're not they are not fans i think
01:22:30that's what it is about being single that i like is that it's like just you can do anything you want
01:22:35and that's a very selfish thing to say that like i can just fly to wherever i want or perform i could
01:22:40say yes to any gig or thing like that and i think that uh like a man with a partner doesn't do that
01:22:46he goes no we got this we need to plan ahead if i'm gonna do a thing i can't just leave my family for
01:22:52five weeks same thing with the dog same thing yeah it's a little bit selfish but it's it's it's a lot
01:22:57easier or not a lot easier but it's a different type of good the grass is greener yeah what's the
01:23:01weirdest date you've been on since you've been sober um i haven't done any dates really yeah smashing grabs
01:23:14his words not mine i actually hope you have no female viewers not anymore yeah they're gonna go
01:23:20this guy sucks no dates yeah well i mean i guess they are dates they're just not very formal it's not
01:23:26like we're going to like a thing just eating pussy right no no i mean i guess oh i'll tell you one
01:23:31here's one we went to a movie and dinner that's a date right yeah how was it uh god it was not good
01:23:40you ever had a woman come out to you know you can't go go back to your house and change you know
01:23:44you can't like she came out of her house and i got jesus i'm gonna be walking around with this what
01:23:48was the outfit it was ridiculous it was it was it was like uh we were going to a swingers party or
01:23:53something i'm going now i have to watch because i dress pretty you know cowboy guy you know i was
01:23:58going on she was scantily clad you're very very revealing clothes silky like little like one piece
01:24:04dress is a problem for you no it's not a problem necessarily if i already loved her or something but
01:24:08it's a first date we're like we're judging each other you know it's kind of a first date so i'm
01:24:12going i don't need this you know but anyway she gets in my truck and we go and um the part that made
01:24:17me think of it is we were watching a movie called backrooms now the i won't spoil it for anybody
01:24:22hasn't seen backrooms it's still in theaters whatever but the idea is that like you're trying
01:24:26to put together what's happening as the movie's going so i'm in i'm all in i'm like this movie
01:24:31rules and she keeps talking she's okay and this is this guy is i think he's in this other movie and
01:24:35i'm like yeah he's in a lot of movies you know and she just keeps talking and i don't want her
01:24:40talking during the movie it's like it was with my niece or something and i was just kind of like
01:24:43trying to give her the signals you know that i don't like it after like an hour into the movie
01:24:46i'm liking the movie the movie rules i'm excited i'm trying to figure out where it's going also all
01:24:50my friends saw like the night before so i'm excited to be able to talk about the thing and then she
01:24:54goes this movie sucks let's leave and i was like god damn it and so we left never got to see the
01:25:01other half of backrooms and people like how was it and i go i don't know i saw the beginning and i
01:25:05don't know but i left because i'm a good guy did you pump did you yeah we didn't really i dropped
01:25:11her off i think it broke her mind because women don't aren't used to offering up themselves in
01:25:16in a vulnerable sexual way with they're not they've never had rejection men are pretty good at it we
01:25:20get rejected we go yeah that's what it's like to be a guy yeah you're right she's i don't think this
01:25:25could very beautiful woman i don't she was like what like she goes you don't want to come in i was
01:25:28no thanks it was nice it was great and then she i lied tonight was great and then she's like well
01:25:34i can come back to you and i was like nah i gotta get up early which is not true either
01:25:37watching this movie turning around and going back to back rooms well i think it broke her brain like
01:25:42what do you what do you mean yeah like it doesn't go well for even like whatever the woman looks like
01:25:47they're 100 of the time when they offer up sex like there's takers you know yeah so far so that kind of
01:25:53rattled her i think but also it's like i'm not we talked about this last time like not being hot to
01:25:57trot like if you're not ready if you get the big call yeah and you're not ready whether it's
01:26:01committed relationship or not it's like a there's some fallout what do you think she'd say if we
01:26:06heard her side of the story same thing i think she said the same thing but she'd be like yeah so he
01:26:11comes out gets out of the truck like i'm dressed up nice and he comes up looking like a total no
01:26:19he's like all into this lame movie no no we get back he thinks he's gonna get me and i'm just like um
01:26:25you can come in if you want please say no please say no please say no thank god he said you want to
01:26:30know what every girl has to say about me that's dating me because i don't think that girl would
01:26:33say that this is what 100 of every woman that's ever been around me says that guy won't shut the
01:26:39up that's all it is i'm like my whole jabbering yammering existence i talk a lot like i just i so
01:26:47if someone's with me for longer than a month they're like this guy needs to just talk backrooms
01:26:52yeah that's my biggest flaw i can't be quiet i'm a talker what what's your plan with is it just
01:26:57never going to happen again because you got the you got the on ice right now what does that mean
01:27:01you put her on ice that's what you your move what you did i will never talk again that's why i don't
01:27:05mind telling that story okay yeah i'm saying you guys i'm not interested you have it on ice right now
01:27:10yeah but i could i could tell after hour one i was like this is going nowhere what that's why why
01:27:14sleep good for you especially if you're not drinking anymore because otherwise it might be a little
01:27:17different yeah i know when i was drinking like there was a lot of casual sex i don't do that now
01:27:21oh really i don't want to do that so you're just yeah that's nice yeah i think it's better it keeps
01:27:24me more level yeah you start hooking up and then that's like just inviting these like um kind of
01:27:30social entanglements in your life because every once you sleep with a girl she's she's like oh i know
01:27:34that guy you know like now they got now they're telling stories so now it's not cash now it's not
01:27:38cash yeah i don't want to do that so how do you what's your threshold for entering
01:27:42sexual i think if i liked the chick i would then i would yeah it's casual
01:27:47no but i mean i mean if i'm like i like her and i'm like i think yeah i think i want to
01:27:51date this it's just not you're not doing it for the sake of doing it what's the threshold if she's
01:27:55just into me upright if i like if she wants to is this particularly bad in l.a like i imagine seeing me
01:28:03like parties people talking gossiping i think l.a and new york are unique in the fashion that like
01:28:10everyone is so single for so long it's more socially acceptable to be single yeah and so
01:28:14then that creates all these extra problems also dating is so complicated already while it's ever
01:28:20changing yeah so now dating apps and social media and climbing and do you follow them or do they follow
01:28:26you back and it's just becomes it was already somewhat complex and now you have like we've
01:28:32normalized girls talking to a million guys at once and being like well i'm not sleeping with them i'm
01:28:36just yeah there's just too many things where it's ever changing that it's it's it's uh not fun and so
01:28:41i think most guys uh i'll speak for them my friends and i i think they just feel like defeated like
01:28:46i'm not even defeated just like fatigued like we don't want to deal with this so i just don't join
01:28:51in the reindeer games and then when a girl catches my eye that i'm interested in then i will
01:28:55pursue her and i'll ask her out and i'll make those sacrifices which i've done recently there's
01:28:58a girl i kind of like so that's been good unreal i wait are you married no okay no we talked about
01:29:06this before the uh like last chopper out of saigon like at what point did it feel safe to do like
01:29:13dating and then it doesn't and you're just like found the chick for 30 years ago everything worked
01:29:19out great and i didn't need to ever think about it again it must be so nice to have just like shelved
01:29:24that part so now i get to focus on everything else including building the family and having
01:29:28the dog and doing the business yeah no this is definitely making me feel like i made a good
01:29:32decision no you did yeah no you know what's funny sounds like a horror show adult dating so sometimes
01:29:38like these guys will see me doing like fun things or like i'll have like a wild night or something like
01:29:42that or at the golf tournament they're like you were with like a babe last night or whatever
01:29:46and they're like married guys and i i think that in that moment they're going man this seems pretty good i go yeah
01:29:53last night my life is way better than yours yeah so there's little moments where i do get to win
01:29:58and you guys have like this whatever but trust me if you found someone you love you're winning that's
01:30:03that's it you the grass is greener over there i i'm lonely on christmases i'm on airplanes alone i'm
01:30:10on stage on my green rooms alone i'm alone a lot i live alone i think that there's flashes of like
01:30:15this is way more exciting i'm on a jet ski we look at her blah blah blah but i think that like we're all
01:30:20trying to we're all trying to find love except these autistic kids and you're doing headstands
01:30:27some people are reportedly spending up to thirteen thousand dollars in an effort to reset their body
01:30:32count to zero oh yeah clinic in brazil is offering hymen reconstruction surgery with reports claiming
01:30:37many of its patients are women over 30 who want a fresh start before entering a serious relationship
01:30:42or marriage jocko you've got a very different kind of body count would you consider hymen surgery to
01:30:49reset yours well i'm a man he doesn't have a hymen you have a gaiman but you do have a very
01:30:55different kind of body count to the ones that the girls are going to go and do right and neither one
01:30:59of them can reset it there's nothing in the world that we can reset either of those that's true yeah
01:31:04that's true but that's that's a thing that's chicks going to brazil what a what a what a scam oh look
01:31:11what are you talking that's that's new chapter that ought to delete justin's contact card out of your phone
01:31:19there you go that's it i mean 13 grand oh look at that virgin
01:31:28there she is she got some flower water poured on her head and now that means she didn't bang ricky
01:31:35like what a dumb thing this is such a scam yeah that's pretty tough they're like they
01:31:40did you ever see the cacao ceremonies people do they like drink hot chocolate and they're like whoa i'm
01:31:45tripping there's a real thing it's called cacao ceremonies they like drink a lot of hot chocolate
01:31:50and they're like oh my god my pineal gland's opening up and they like well here's another thing how high
01:31:56is your body count that you're flying if you're there you eat enough cacao like how many dudes did
01:32:02you bang that you needed to go to a ruba or whatever to get someone to pour water on your head
01:32:06like it just kind of suggests that you're a whore just doing this thing like all right sorry i got
01:32:12to do a trip i'm going you know i got to reset my body count like that's crazy yeah you don't
01:32:17need to be exercised i'm going to brazil to be exercised it's insane to me and i think it's a
01:32:23little but the cacao thing the i've seen them in like uh kuya that that hot and cold place that's here
01:32:29they do these cacao things i i do look at it and sometimes think that's just like a horlicks or like
01:32:35a nesquik like oh it's probably nice to drink a little hot chocolate yeah yeah it's nice drinking
01:32:40chat with you what's this cacao ceremony it's just very funny does that not look nice it's very nice
01:32:48so i kind of just break in there and bite them in the face you watch this and just go what are we
01:32:53doing i kind of like drink protein chocolate protein all the time i'm talking about the tent and it makes
01:32:59me kind of feel like this on their head that looks nice it does look nice i'll be honest but it's dumb as
01:33:04hell here's a problem it's like that'd be a tough combo the entire time what would the hot chocolate
01:33:10just hot chocolate talk with adults look at them this doesn't make you mad no it makes me laugh
01:33:20look at them i bet they're all in there oh you know this is a subs we don't have kids
01:33:25who needs kids fight the patriarch look at them is that not like you though is that not just the female
01:33:31version of you but with hot chocolate no that's not me bro it's ridiculous i like the hot chocolate
01:33:38don't get me wrong that's not what i'm judging they were talking about them in a tent sitting
01:33:41cross-legged and going like hey next up is a slam poetry about race like what are we doing
01:33:47yeah it's a thing man that's a cow it's like that's like the super light psychedelic people go
01:33:52for they go like i'll do the cacao ceremony if you don't want to do yeah i feel like i would do that
01:33:56i wouldn't do the psychedelic but i'd do the cacao ceremony yeah i might do on this afternoon it would
01:33:59be nice yeah we should have brought chocolate we should have done it we should have started off
01:34:03with like ceremonial grade cacao yeah seeing who got actually hunter biden on monday yeah no let's get
01:34:09his threshold for anything he's gonna be like period cramps while you have some hot cocoa
01:34:15you gotta i've got to try and get the female audience back somehow you know what i mean that's my bad
01:34:19god damn it yeah man what uh are you still on are you weeding still are you still smoking or he's
01:34:26because you did for a while right yeah i did for like a really long time it naturally kind of just
01:34:29fell off honestly so it wasn't a get arrested no oh no no i got a question for matt yeah you're still
01:34:36drinking raw milk straight from the absolutely yeah dude absolutely are you against raw milk not at
01:34:42all that was awesome yeah you told me about it i was like i gotta try it it rules the problem is
01:34:46you're against weed my commitment to like finding this milk was not as committed as yours it's hard
01:34:51to go to a farmer's market you go to a farmer's market i don't even never been to a farmer's
01:34:54market in my life that's crazy those places piss me off too i go and i go what is all this dog
01:34:59shit farmers go to the store no you need the raw milk she's lab grown you eat lab grown meat what the
01:35:04hell you eat the lab grown meat in california i don't want to but it's pretty easy to get i'll be
01:35:09there yeah what's the sales case for raw milk you i have if i drink regular pasteurized milk
01:35:16i get congested i fart like i'm like lactose intolerant if i drink raw milk no problem
01:35:21you strike me as a raw milk guy yeah we get some raw milk on it's awesome yeah the only thing that
01:35:26sucks about is it goes bad really quick yeah you got it you gotta get really small bottles so you get
01:35:31a bottle just drink it within an hour yeah no you have you have like going bad honey you have six
01:35:36days to chug the gallon i just we six days is all right that's not bad for a gallon kill a gallon of six
01:35:42days but yeah the uh but yeah the weed i slowed down but it's always there i tap it when i need to
01:35:49it doesn't agree with me at all i hate weed it really doesn't why so why do you hate weed it just
01:35:54doesn't work for me one and then two i feel like it's a dreamer's nightmare you know like all these
01:35:59guys i know are chasing their dreams and then they smoke weed and they just don't do anything they just
01:36:03sit around they're already kind of sitting around and now they're just all sitting around more i know so
01:36:07many people that smoke weed and do all kinds of stuff that's good i really the world is kind of
01:36:11split into a few groups of people this is kind of a interesting thing i learned from a dude called
01:36:15edward slingle and he wrote a book about alcohol and one of the reasons alcohol got spread so wide
01:36:21uh civilizationally is that it's very reliable how it affects people like you drunk is pretty similar to
01:36:27the sensation of me drunk is pretty similar even if your behavior is a bit different the sensation is kind
01:36:32of the same but one person that smokes weed gets horny one person gets sleepy one person gets
01:36:37creative one person gets forgetful and lazy and it's like the fact that it's so buried yeah means
01:36:43that it's kind of a bit of a shitty drug to do together because everyone's going off in different
01:36:48or hard to understand why i would not like it and he would like it yeah why don't you like it i'm going
01:36:53it's terrible when i do it you don't want to be around me when you i freak out still a lot but it's
01:36:58kind of once you like figure it out that wave down i will say i think mushrooms are way better than i
01:37:02love mushrooms mushrooms rule i would say mushrooms yeah you should do mushrooms and run a marathon
01:37:07after this we should all actually be awesome that'd be awesome go rock and roll get some cacao and
01:37:16and then all you said are that's weird though the alcohol thing like i know people that when they get
01:37:21when they drink they get they're crying in the corner about yeah i know some other dude's gonna fight
01:37:24everybody someone else is laughing someone gets super social like that seems a little bit strange
01:37:29to me to hear that yeah that was his argument i i think the sensation is at least the same for most
01:37:34people maybe their behavior changes right um but you you are right i mean i ran nightclubs for a decade
01:37:39and a half right i saw a million people on the front door of nightclubs and you see every different
01:37:46version of like inner child demon come back out like my we had this pick this is kind of interesting for
01:37:53anyone that still works in nightlife or in hospitality if a girl walks into a venue a late night venue
01:37:58usually after 10 or 11 pm wearing a jacket of some kind maybe a denim jacket or a leather jacket one
01:38:03of those like suit jacket things and she doesn't have her arms in the sleeves
01:38:0970 to 80 percent chance she's going to get thrown out within the next hour like they were always every
01:38:13single time that they went in they were the ones that would like swill someone throw a drink on
01:38:17someone it's kind of like the cutoff leather jacket like sort of smoking kid in my school it was just
01:38:24every single time it became a meme and we didn't even know why we just kind of started to select this
01:38:29thing and we'd be like dude jacket something about sleeves those hell's angels never sure enough sure
01:38:34enough 45 minutes later she's thrown a drink over someone that bitch over there she slept she that
01:38:40fucking slide before you know it the door certainly you know like an unwieldy cat like picked her up
01:38:45like this yeah you have to you have to as a bouncer you have to like fold women's arms across their
01:38:48chest crack them on your head just gotta strike first slap him with a period cramp simulator yeah
01:39:00the bell curve for alcohol probably is there's probably is it there's outliers but there probably is
01:39:04way more of just people it's a good way to put it yeah i think that's true we did we in a crowd of
01:39:09people who are all high is like 50 of people are dipping off stuff it's not really a good crowd
01:39:14thing i'd like to know who runs pr for marijuana because like when i say i don't want to do drugs
01:39:19anymore people are like oh you must have a problem or i don't want to drink the guy who cares the second
01:39:24i push back against marijuana everyone's like dude what are you talking about man you just got to try
01:39:28a different strand and like well what happened and how many times have you tried am i good i just don't
01:39:32want to do it dude yeah it's not good and then everyone just keeps pushing it on alcohol is the
01:39:38same though everyone who drinks is like come on man have a drink well they want to drink with you
01:39:42they want your company yeah yeah it's the only drug where if you don't do it people assume you have a
01:39:46problem yeah hey dude why are you not why are you not shooting a crack tonight what's wrong with you
01:39:51come on just do a little yeah just it's a tuesday just do a little heroin i've heard that people who
01:39:57start shooting heroin there is a big thing where they're trying to get other people to start shooting
01:40:01heroin too because then they get to be the guy who gets you heroin yeah they're like a middleman so
01:40:06they can do free heroin but they're bad salesmen because they're all like hunched over and you're
01:40:09like i can't trust i used to work with this guy and he had just he would just be sweating all he was
01:40:14shooting heroin all the time you could be like me sweating all the time he'd be like dude honestly
01:40:17if you shot one bag you'd be partying and like dude it was he was living in this like pretty
01:40:22up thing and his like girlfriend was there just on a mattress when you walk in and just be like
01:40:26he was like kind of tricking her out too and it was just kind of like i think i'm all right i think
01:40:30i'm gonna steer clear of joining your man of the people have you ever heard hunter biden talk about
01:40:35crack yeah i saw that i sent you the clip earlier on today what is that it is just the best ad read
01:40:40for crack i've ever heard in my entire life he makes it sound cool there's a comic named jimmy uh
01:40:47who is one of my favorite people in cleveland he's the best and he said he did uh he did crack one time
01:40:52and because he does all the drugs and then one night he's just on one so he's like i'll try it
01:40:56bought it from like a homeless guy and he said it felt so good that he started to walk to his bank
01:41:02account like i'm gonna take all of my money and just get as much of this yeah the first time he
01:41:07ever did it but he passed out on the way to like the atm and just slept like on the street like again
01:41:13he goes but i'm just telling you the sensation that i felt was the greatest thing i've i've ever felt
01:41:19in my life and that's how addicted one of my neighbor's nephews told he was a meth head and
01:41:23ended up going to jail and he did seven years in jail and he got out he was just talking to me about
01:41:27and he said he tried meth for the first time he goes as soon as i tried it it was the only thing i
01:41:32ever wanted to do for the rest of my life it's crazy he did he burned like every bridge and you know in
01:41:37in his neighborhood and his whole family and then the next city and he ended up going all over america
01:41:41until he eventually got busted in texas that's crazy yeah down in the wild it's pretty powerful
01:41:46weird keyhole in the back of some people's brains or systems or whatever and just the right drug just
01:41:54like yeah explosion like the rest of your life just falls apart yeah that's how opiates are for some
01:42:00people i remember i tried like percocets and stuff and it was like that that's like a painkiller yeah
01:42:04it was like not really for me i was like i don't understand these things i know people tried them
01:42:07it was that was it they were just like this is it yeah this uh 7-oh stuff yeah is 7-hydroxytragenine
01:42:16something i watched uh hamilton morris the dude that used to do the vice documentaries about drugs
01:42:20he did this breakdown of what was going on with it it's being used to get people off opiates but it's
01:42:25they're also sold in gummy bears at gas stations it's crazy it's kratom based yeah it's like pressed
01:42:31crate it's like it's like kratom's kratom you know like trank is fentanyl's fentanyl uh it's this but
01:42:37legal and the shell garage on south lamar has just got stacks and stacks and so there's kratom and then
01:42:44there's the 708 bills and then i think it's i think it's really impair you if you drive like
01:42:49is it i don't understand it's like 13 times i think more stronger than morphine like you're selling it
01:42:54at the 7-eleven yeah and then though it's called it's like persis yes like pr ks yeah i think they're
01:43:00illegal now i think they're making them illegal they're trying to yeah right now they're like
01:43:04apparently i think they're i swear to god like 10 i think it's maybe even today that they're trying to
01:43:10pass the vape shops are crushed between the thc a or what is it delta 8 thc that now if you get caught
01:43:16with delta 8 in texas you go to jail for like five five years what's that a strong form of th not even
01:43:22but it's like the synthetic thc stuff that they're selling in vape shops and uh now all that stuff's
01:43:27like super illegal in texas like a vape cartridge i think a vape cartridge is like five years what they
01:43:32kept on doing was basically adding some new molecule we're going to change this one more than this one
01:43:36bond and it doesn't affect anything to do with how your body interacts with it delta 9 delta 10 delta
01:43:4111 you just keep on running away and the legislation can't catch up quickly enough and that's going on
01:43:46with this world it was the farm bill the farm bill said farm bill that people you got you could grow cbd
01:43:52basically which like hemp is weed they're saying things it's just like you can kind of you know curate it
01:43:57to have different cannibal or whatever cannabinoids so you can grow weed with thc that's weed if you grow
01:44:03weed with cbd it's hemp it's like you know it's the same exact plant but then you could do the thing
01:44:08where if you take every cbd plant has like 0.3 thc but if you grow a whole field of it you could isolate
01:44:15all that thc and get like thousands of grams of pure thc and that was technically legal to then make drinks
01:44:20with so then they did a thing where you could have weed with thca which is just regular weed when you
01:44:26heat thca turns into thc that's like when you decarboxylate weed to make brownies or whatever
01:44:31you have to heat it up in the carbon molecule whatever and the uh so they were just selling
01:44:35thca weed it was just weed legally for like three years due to the hemp farm bill that was federally
01:44:41legal that's why weed was legal for four years basically and then they just i think they're
01:44:45repealing changed this have you been to amsterdam and had the uh so they've got mushrooms which is
01:44:49what grows above ground and then truffles yeah which is the root system and it's just the same thing
01:44:55but they legislated what was above ground yeah right and hey if you eat like those kind of rules yeah
01:45:03top part pal yeah bottom the funny thing with the farm bill it became that the u.s department of
01:45:09agriculture was overlooking weed grows for like four years so you could literally grow weed
01:45:15and a guy from the u.s department of agriculture would be like yeah it looks good
01:45:18there was no it wasn't they should have like the dea someone regular it was weed was unregulated for
01:45:22like four years some guy that knows fertilizer and crop rotation combine harvest is very nice yeah
01:45:28i had to take a selfie just to watch porn last night oh you did it oh because you're in texas yeah texas
01:45:34got you gotta have you said you're an adult no yeah i did it well like on your phone selfie yeah
01:45:39yeah it said hey but take a selfie take a dick pic true no i didn't i'm in some database now where
01:45:45they go yeah but the selfie go he goes oh he's old enough because that's not the case in that's a
01:45:50real thing i'm not making that up your political enemies are going to use that you're in the
01:45:53fucking well i looked at the dnc database sorry guys that i looked at porn you're in the dns i'm a
01:45:59terrible guy i did do it on the 20th floor without looking alone for 15 days straight you might look at
01:46:04some porn sorry guys you're in texas for 15 days no i was just saying i was alone for 15 days i see
01:46:12yeah what are you doing in town what what's what else is going on i've got mothership shows uh all
01:46:17weekend unreal but then i just been doing shooting guns and hanging out with friends and dropping into
01:46:22jocko's world that's it can you tell us about can you tell that story about the huge off sniper rifle
01:46:27thing that was so yeah uh so somebody made a sniper rifle to to see if this was a good idea
01:46:35and i want to see it was either 20 millimeter or 25 but i think it was a 25 millimeter sniper rifle and
01:46:41they brought it up to our sniper school and they wanted to see if this like is a viable idea so 25
01:46:48millimeter is massive this is a massive freaking bullet and this uh they start giving it to the students to
01:46:55see if they can hit anything well you're you're like bracing for for that thing to go off and no
01:47:00one could shoot it properly and you know guy might hit the target one time and then they're just so
01:47:05petrified to pull the trigger again they'd miss and they would just be like hey i'm not shooting this
01:47:09anymore and so i have a buddy who was the senior guy that was in charge of the sniper school who is
01:47:16one hard hard individual and a little crazy and no one could make this gun work and then finally he's
01:47:23like all right give it to me and he sat down and just like gritted his teeth and just cracked off
01:47:28around hit the target just sucked it up cracked off another round hit the target again cracked off
01:47:34three that's like a normal three round group puts it all on target and the people that have manufactured
01:47:38this weapon like oh my gosh it's a viable option and he just got up and was like do not make this
01:47:43weapon it was just so crazy but a testament to that dude who is like just a hard crazy i'm like that dude
01:47:52yeah he's like the guy one of the guys we were talking about earlier like yeah you know
01:47:56you he he would need an outlet you know what i mean but that's exactly who you want in war
01:48:00like somebody that'd be like oh you want no one can do this cool watch this i'll do it
01:48:04i'll i'll take whatever concussive impact there is to the shooting this thing i'll do it what is
01:48:09it that's happening if you fire a gun that's that big is it just the shock wave is it the fact that
01:48:13it's hitting you in the body like what where's the yeah the worst thing is the shock wave like the
01:48:16shock wave that concussive wave that you're going to get over your head you know is going to be this
01:48:22can be gnarly it's a real thing like just sickness disorienting little like micro it's like getting
01:48:27cracked in the head when you spar and you get when somebody cracks you and you're like oh you see a little
01:48:31white flash and you can still power through it like he did and then you take another you know crack to
01:48:36the head you're like okay i can power through you that's cracking you to that yeah you you're cracking
01:48:39the trigger of this thing and then the next day you're like wow i wonder why i have this headache
01:48:43oh yeah i can't remember the last day exactly is that not you know when guys have got huge cannons
01:48:48and they're in world war ii and stuff like that would that not have been that time totally totally
01:48:53yeah would it affect a dolphin's brain the same as it possibly possibly i don't know it depends on
01:48:58who's riding the thing's back the shock is what hurts the worst yeah after like after picking
01:49:05mines off the straight up yeah probably i always think about seeing world war ii when the guys are
01:49:10just loading huge shells in and then they've got a like a bathroom light switch hole boom yep they
01:49:17didn't even wear hearing protection either no like they didn't wear hearing privileges just got some
01:49:21yeah i thought about that today when i was shooting just about how much my grandpa would have loved just
01:49:26the technology that was in the scope the scope alone i was like this is pretty i mean i'm nailing it
01:49:31because the scope is so accurate and whatever it's like they didn't have any of that you know they're
01:49:36chasing away shooting stuff what's the truth around there's these rumors i don't know whether it was
01:49:40world war ii or vietnam or whatever the number of soldiers that never fired their weapon directly at
01:49:46the enemy yeah did that ever get debunked or whatever yeah it got debunked so there's a guy named
01:49:51sla marshall who wrote this book and wrote these theories about how and he went around and interviewed
01:49:56soldiers and it turns out you know it wasn't true you know like he used it and it's kind of he had the
01:50:02hypothesis going into it but it wasn't true and the theory was that maybe people on one side of the
01:50:08battle were not prepared to try and fire the weapon the theory was like it's such an abhorrent thing for
01:50:14humans to like shoot a weapon at other humans that they just would get to that point and they'd go i can't
01:50:19do it and you know the number was like 10 percent of only 10 percent of the troops involved in direct
01:50:26combat would actually engage the enemy and so that's when they started using man-shaped silhouettes to
01:50:30shoot at for targets and and even putting like pictures so you get oh they're going to condition
01:50:34these guys to be able to shoot you know at man-shaped targets because they said they needed that kind
01:50:39of conditioning but again the guy sla marshall he was you know he was like a reservist and he was a he
01:50:46was a journalist in his regular life so it was kind of him you know hyping up a story and
01:50:50it's sensationalism but also pretty nuts to explain like world war ii casualty numbers but yeah it's
01:50:57just 10 of the guys yeah well yeah imagine if everybody else had decided to find it just be no
01:51:02one yeah yeah yeah that's pretty nuts yeah and he he kind of he also made some stories up about how much
01:51:09he had been in combat in world war one so it was the whole thing and he had a lot of clout inside the
01:51:14military you know he had a lot of clout from that you know he wrote that that theory he wrote another
01:51:18theory about how much weight guys can carry that was a little bit more realistic but yeah so it's a
01:51:22little bit debunked what happens to guys like that is he on like a list right now or is it like people
01:51:26want to kill that guy you know when someone starts publishing and making things up it must piss you off
01:51:32yeah i think it pisses everyone off yeah that's my point that's a good it's kind of the rule is the code
01:51:36yeah like hey don't try and make yourself into something that you weren't you know and generally
01:51:41speaking it's like oh if you're in the military good job thank you for your service with you know
01:51:45there's a whole spectrum of things that you could do everyone from being a supply clerk to somebody
01:51:49that's on the front lines yeah you know get in direct combat and it's like yeah everyone did their
01:51:54part thank you for doing your part where people get into trouble is when they make it out to seem as
01:52:01as if they did more than they actually yeah so yeah also one time i was at top golf and my friend josh
01:52:06nelson for a six dollar discount they go are you a veteran or a senior citizen or whatever if stolen
01:52:13valor he said i was he said that he was a veteran and he got six bucks off yeah i'm coming for you
01:52:18what's his name jeff johnson josh nelson josh nelson really 25 millimeter rifle six bucks josh was it
01:52:26worth it he's probably getting the chili the the uh chili's discount and everything yeah well she just
01:52:30goes are you a senior citizen or a veteran or uh whatever the third thing was and he goes yes you
01:52:37know so maybe he was stealing valley from the old people or the students but i took it as a as an insult
01:52:43to my man here so josh what did watch your back what are the best privileges that veteran privileges
01:52:51that you get i always hear that you can uh active military gets on the plane first that seems pretty
01:52:55cool not even first though i think concierge key it's on before the military i swear to god i don't
01:53:01think they're first we can only get concierge key if you're a veteran i don't think so i don't
01:53:05know what that is what is that uh i don't know some like super million months i remember i i
01:53:10could be wrong but i'm almost positive it's not military first it's like i swear to god it's like
01:53:16it's like sky club or something yeah it's some bullshit i swear to god if you have a seahawks
01:53:21i could be wrong but i i'm i think i think i think you're wrong i think you might think i think
01:53:27active duty military is first goes first okay i think that is who goes first they go right after
01:53:31the pre-boarding oh and then it's like disabled people people that need wheelchairs and assistance
01:53:36and then right here we go what order does the military get let on in planes depends on the
01:53:41airline there we go passengers needing extra assistance active duty yeah why would wheelchairs
01:53:46be before active military because you gotta take yeah it takes a while yeah but that better than
01:53:52what are we talking about there's already sitting they're relaxed very judgmental for the people
01:53:57that have got disabilities today what else do you get what else probably quite quite frankly they're
01:54:01probably the best one of the best benefits that you get from the military is the va loan so you get a
01:54:06loan to buy a house and it's no money down so that's that's pretty awesome yeah how does that work
01:54:12you just you know you get a va loan so if you're gonna buy a va sorry veterans administration so
01:54:18if you're gonna buy a 300 000 house instead of having to come up with whatever 10 or 20 to put
01:54:23down on that you can just get a va loan you it's all you can borrow all that money cool so yeah
01:54:28pay back whenever you want it makes that first well not whenever you want you'll have a mortgage but
01:54:32the loan bit right yeah yeah the loan it's just a normal mortgage but yeah that's a cool thing
01:54:36yeah there's a bunch of good benefits uh you know the the health benefits that you get for the rest
01:54:40of your life which you know people have different experiences with the va there's there's it's somewhat
01:54:46socialized medicine which as you know being from england is not always the best thing but since it is
01:54:51america and we try and take care of our veterans some people depending it's a lot of it is like
01:54:57almost like a franchise you know you go to some franchise and it's pretty good to go and you go
01:55:00to another franchise and it's not so there's some of that with the va where depending on where you
01:55:05are and what the va is like in your city or in your town it can be pretty good or it can be pretty bad
01:55:10so there's you know obviously that's a great thing the health benefits that you get from it
01:55:15um you get you know money for college if you want to go to college or you can pass it on to your kids
01:55:20if you want to do that so yeah there's a bunch of good i mean there's a bunch of really good
01:55:24benefits from being in the military and obviously i love being in the military so i'll say all kinds
01:55:30of good stuff about it the uk the biggest difference that i've seen from going uk to us from the military
01:55:35side is how much reverence there is for veterans like it's almost to be honest kind of looked down on
01:55:41a little in the uk if you were really yeah i mean maybe not if you went to sandhurst and did the
01:55:46officer thing in the track but it's just seen as you didn't choose to have a more refined it's very
01:55:55it feels very icky like it doesn't feel like the same kind of uh pedestalization like upholding the
01:56:02the sanctity of protecting the country and doing the thing that's kind of crazy considering the proud
01:56:07tradition of the british military there is no getting on the plane first i've i mean maybe you
01:56:13get a discount in nando's for 10 or something but top golf top golf uk um i just it's not got the same
01:56:21i mean and i was wearing some black rifle coffee t-shirt a couple years ago and there's that tri
01:56:27blend military green thing and i think on all of their t-shirts they've got the flag on the arm and
01:56:32it's just it's got a reaper on the front of it and some older guy on a plane that was sat toward the
01:56:37front so i walked past that was i'm being sort of shunted along i mean with the like cabin class
01:56:43going toward the back you know i can't slow down and he goes thank you for your service i'm like
01:56:47no it's not i'm really i'm english and i didn't like you know like i stole valor like passively
01:56:55he sort of threw valor at me which i think is different and i'm like i can't put this down i'm
01:56:59like i'm trying to bat it away dude if i serve food in the military and someone even hit it towards
01:57:04me being in combat i'd be like i don't want to talk about it i know this about myself i know this
01:57:09about myself i would have 100 do that and i hate that about myself but i would definitely do that
01:57:14i don't like i wouldn't say anything i would be like uh guys like these you know what i'm saying
01:57:19i'm just honest i'm just being honest if someone were to give me credit like that i wouldn't be like
01:57:23well actually i'd be like you know we all played our part it's actually i'll talk to guys or guys will
01:57:28ask me guys that were in the military like before september 11th after vietnam before september
01:57:3211th they did whatever 1994 to 1999 and they feel so bad and so guilty that they didn't serve in
01:57:41combat and you know i always tell them hey you did what your country needed to do at the time you know
01:57:44like thank you for your service and that's but but guys do feel guilty about that what was happening
01:57:49then from a military perspective nothing yeah i mean i was in the entire 90s and we didn't do
01:57:54barely anything we did like shipboardings or over in the persian gulf people that were smuggling
01:58:00whatever stuff in and out of iraqs or we did shipboardings over there to like get control
01:58:03those vessels but that was pretty much like the real the real missions that we were doing at the
01:58:07time and it was just not that big of a deal so what happens when 2001 comes along like what what
01:58:13did that feel like to go from seeing this period of relative i mean as peaceful as the fucking
01:58:19military with guns can be i suppose very peaceful and then there is a very large or two very large
01:58:24pistols that get yeah yeah no it was it was uh total totally different yeah total game changer for
01:58:29everybody yeah overnight what was waking up mid-september like um well we just knew i mean
01:58:36everybody knew that we were going to war now if you would have asked me at the time would we be what
01:58:42you're gonna be at war for two decades i wouldn't have thought that we all thought that much like
01:58:47some of the other sort of operations that had taken place whether it's panama or grenada something like
01:58:52that these things lasted a few days even the first gulf war over in 72 hours i was so i was the the
01:58:58navy had sent me to college at the time so i was in college and i was all distraught because i thought
01:59:03i was going to miss this war you know i want to be a commander my whole life you know there's nothing
01:59:07going on in the 90s when i'm in i know that we're all going to war and it's probably going to be over
01:59:10very shortly and i'm not going to be a part of it so i actually called the guy that was in charge
01:59:14of assigning us to wherever whatever seal team you're going to go to and i said hey sir you know please
01:59:19get me out of here send me back to a seal team i'll finish college later and he he said hey this
01:59:24is going to last a long time and i didn't believe him he was this is going to last a really long time
01:59:27and i was like no it's not he goes i'll finish college and i'll get you to a team and sure enough
01:59:33i mean he got me to a team a little while later and sure enough he got me to a team that was deploying
01:59:37next luckily thankfully to iraq but even my first deployment to iraq i thought oh this is going to be
01:59:42over you know we'll be i'm so lucky i'm get to be here and do do my job for six months right now
01:59:48because it's probably going to be over then probably that was 2003 2004 now we get into 2005 you start
01:59:55saying oh this is going to be on for a long time and then you know it lasted for two decades when did
01:59:59you realize that it was going to be more than just a couple of a couple of years i would say the middle
02:00:04of 2005 that's when the news you started really hearing the shift in the news that they were saying
02:00:09that this is an insurgency now you know as opposed to just a regime hey we're going to take out the
02:00:14regime and walk away which could we could have done but instead now we're going to stay there we're
02:00:18going to try and turn them into you know a democratic country it's like okay that might not be a great
02:00:24idea okay and now you start to have the insurgency which is al-qaeda leadership starts coming in from
02:00:30other countries and they're starting to run and direct and finance operations inside iraq and the
02:00:37local populace again you know there's so many complexities to this but you know the the the shias
02:00:44are the majority people there and it's been run by the sunnis for a long time so it doesn't take much to
02:00:49sort of spark a spark friction between those two elements because they already have bad blood between
02:00:54each other and of course they al-qaeda doesn't want america to have any success over there
02:01:00so they do their best to spark that conflict between the sunnis and the shias it's a disaster yeah well
02:01:079 11 is maybe second only to the atomic bombs is like very small period of time that just totally
02:01:15changed the course of the future yeah yeah for sure for sure um and i would say even the atomic bombs were
02:01:22less because that that was you know the direction that we were going in we were going in that direction
02:01:26if we would have if we didn't have atomic bombs that time we would have landed on mainline
02:01:30japan and we would have we would have been a costly victory but we were going to win so i would say
02:01:35that yeah 9 11 was even more of a radical such a left turn yeah such a left turn were you more sunni
02:01:40or shia so it depends on how you look at it the the the sunnis and the shias you know it's it's one
02:01:48of those scenarios where we worked alongside the sunnis but the shias made up the vast majority of the army
02:01:55of the of the iraqi army so you kind of had to you know you kind of had to do both you kind of had to
02:02:00get it get along with both of them reasonable yeah yeah both guy yeah you kind of got to get along
02:02:06with both it's crazy i mean it's 25th anniversary is in a month yeah what for 911 i didn't know it's
02:02:14called an anniversary of a tragedy what what would you call it maybe birthday memorial
02:02:21maybe memorial just call it 25 like 250 yeah okay like america yeah memorial i guess but yeah make
02:02:2725 merch bro i remember before i moved out here it was the back end of uh 21 and uh i was watching
02:02:35these awesome documentaries netflix did just the best like the archive footage even though you've got
02:02:40such a constrained amount they keep on finding or being able to remaster or make stuff a little bit
02:02:44better and uh this is as i'm sort of dreaming of coming out to america and when you're anywhere that
02:02:50hasn't been involved in living in manhattan thinking about it it almost feels unreal it's like watching
02:02:55somebody play a video game right kind of yeah and because it's such a insane city and the density's so
02:03:01high and then obviously the incident's just like so crazy and now that i've spent time lots of time
02:03:07in new york and i love manhattan i think it's so cool thinking about that thing happening like that
02:03:14actually happened in a city that i've spent tons of time in that i've walked around freedom tower i've
02:03:21seen you know ground zero all that stuff that must have just been for the people that were there that
02:03:27must have been like one of the most across all of human history what other days have been more
02:03:34insane to have seen something like that happen yeah so crazy yeah seeing a plane crash into a
02:03:40building too yeah that's crazy yeah i mean obviously pearl harbor was a huge was a huge impact as well
02:03:47but again that we were leaning in that direction anyways you know it was like there's a lot of
02:03:52isolationists in america obviously during that time but you know there's also people that were like hey
02:03:56we got to do something and that that tipped the scales but yeah 911 was just you know we were all just
02:04:02carrying on with normal stuff it's like a and then boom it's shocking incident at pearl harbor and
02:04:08with the atomic bombs but not a shocking trajectory this is a total just yeah yeah off-road left turn
02:04:16thing so yeah it's it's wild that being said i it's so fascinating to see now in retrospect what that
02:04:24did it did it changed travel it changed the entire sort of geopolitical landscape it yeah i wonder how
02:04:31different the world would be if that if that hadn't happened it would be like literally a different
02:04:34fucking universe different universe yeah i mean my life obviously everybody that i know would you know
02:04:40who knows what their lives yeah you're just still being in college maybe just keep do you guys know
02:04:49anyone that was there in manhattan during the only story i've heard is that uh you know lewis j gomez
02:04:55comedian he rollerbladed away he was on rollerblades and he rollerbladed like away from new york city
02:05:00faster than he's ever rolled yeah it's just it's a true story apparently he like he wasn't like at
02:05:05ground zero but he was there when it got infected and he just wheelies could have helped wheelies could
02:05:09have helped he had rollerblade he apparently rollerbladed like super far it was like ah just
02:05:14rollerbladed away he was gomez speed skating away from it so i like that i did talk about ptsd you
02:05:23know it's like the big biggest day in history and you get caught on rollerblades it's like a bad dream
02:05:28nightmare where were you at i was just rollerblading around you know having e-pads on and elbow pads
02:05:36and a helmet wrist guards yeah oh you are safe you know michael jackson was supposed to have a meeting
02:05:41on the top of one of the twin towers on 911 but he slept in can we confirm this sounds like some
02:05:47bullshit let me give you an even better one let me give you an even better boy that was never there
02:05:52seth mcfarlane guy that uh started family guy was supposed to get on a flight on the morning of 9 11
02:06:00and his assistant miss booked the time on his schedule he arrived at the airport but missed the
02:06:04planes the plane left that was the plane that hit the south tower really yeah so he bought his assistant
02:06:10uh rolls-royce as a thank you for having gotten him late it might be right very only uh michael jackson
02:06:16was definitely in new york city the answer is possibly but not definitely established
02:06:21his brother said in his memoir and interviews michael is scheduled to attend meetings at the
02:06:25world trade center that morning but overslept that looks good enough for me no yeah he was
02:06:30wasn't he hooked up to like propanol or something that day probably i think he was propanol he used to
02:06:35a doctor used to like hook him up to like a sleeping drug you like iv pretty sure propanols
02:06:40uh oh is that beta blockers well maybe that's propran propanol it's something propanol is what
02:06:45you use for general anesthetic that's he would you would do anesthesia every night you go to bed
02:06:48fuck my sister was in manhattan my sister was in manhattan on september 11th and we didn't hear for
02:06:54from her for a couple days i mean i wasn't like super worried about her because she lived she didn't
02:06:58work in the trade centers or anything but there was a couple days where there was not good communications
02:07:02coming in out of there because of all the all the traffic over the old school cell phone towers and
02:07:06all that did you hear about the insurance there's like the occurrence debacle with the world trade
02:07:10center so it's like the guy who owned them he was taking out a 99 year lease and it wasn't like their
02:07:17insurance thing it said like in the event of an occurrence like a disastrous occurrence you were to
02:07:21get you know 3.8 billion dollars he was like since it was two planes it's two occurrences i should get
02:07:27like double yeah pretty much like seven billion and he had to fall and some of the insurance
02:07:31companies actually had to pay double and then another one just was like nah we're not doing that
02:07:35but he went for double he's like it was technically two planes so it was one word in the contract that
02:07:39cost billions of dollars well it is i mean what are the odds yeah i mean yeah then that's what you
02:07:44get insurance for yeah that's what i'm saying fuck me i mean that stuff all of the stuff around
02:07:51covid bill ackman you know bill ackman the guy that made the short selling bet against herbalife
02:07:56so he's a trader but he trades against companies as opposed to for them and short sellers are
02:08:01usually pretty disliked inside of the market because you're actively going after market value
02:08:06you're betting against something so you're trying to take them down you're finding out
02:08:08shit to do with their executives or the financials aren't right or the formulation doesn't work or
02:08:12something as opposed to hey positive some i'll just bet on the market going up and to the right
02:08:16and during covid he put a special kind of insurance on early so he sort of put this bet that the whole
02:08:26market was going to go to shit you know the the big short that was michael burry's thing and they
02:08:30made the document the uh movie about it bill ackman made more money than the big short in six weeks
02:08:37with this one bet like called the new big short the problem is the reason i think it's not been
02:08:42dramatized is there's not that much drama it's just one guy who's got a good bit of vision going
02:08:47yeah i think this is i think this is going to work pressing a button pressing a button yeah there's no
02:08:51narrative right there's no story unfolding and all the rest of it but yeah i mean the uh financial
02:08:56crisis yeah like how much would 9 11 have played into that it's yeah crackers dude it's also wild with
02:09:03the financial crisis that's so few people of all these people that are sitting around in in new
02:09:08york in those big buildings trying to figure out what's going to happen and there's like six or seven
02:09:12guys that are good well here's a good bet you guys are all making a bad move the yeah newspapers and
02:09:19the build-up to the great depression i think in the couple of weeks so you can do a sentiment analysis
02:09:25on all of the headlines not a single person is predicting it it comes out of absolute no way everyone's
02:09:32it's going to be a boon the 1929 is going to be even better and yeah people just don't see it so
02:09:40there is a long and illustrious history of people not being able to predict what the
02:09:43is going to go on with finances yeah and by the way that's just true in life you know i always bring
02:09:47this up with like war and combat people oh this is gonna happen that's gonna happen like you don't
02:09:51know you know what's gonna happen so don't put all your money on the table on one bet because
02:09:57it's not a good move unless maybe you're bill ackman yeah yeah how do you it seems like there's sort of
02:10:02two things that you're trying to do at once though one is have as much control and prediction as
02:10:06possible in the micro but it sounds like you're just totally hands-on it's like this war can go
02:10:12on for as long as it does we have no idea how the rest of the country and the geopolitics and the
02:10:16governments are going to interact with each other how is that difficult to well to me it's not that
02:10:21difficult the it's not that difficult to look at any situation and say oh yeah i'm not exactly sure
02:10:26what's going to happen and this is a mistake that america's made many times which is oh we're we
02:10:31this is what's going to happen you know we know what's going to happen you don't know what's going
02:10:34to happen no one knows what's going to happen it's like getting in a fight right you go you walk up
02:10:38you're walking down the street you see some guy that's whatever skinny and weak looking and possibly
02:10:43drunk and you're like oh i'm going to kick this guy's ass what happens he pulls out a knife
02:10:47you know you you stumble like there's there's there's things that can happen that you cannot
02:10:51predict even when you're bigger stronger and if you have that attitude lack of humility
02:10:57then you're going to make mistakes so you know all these things that go on in the world when people
02:11:02start start explaining exactly how it's going to happen i'm like you do not know what's going to
02:11:07happen you don't understand human will like how do you know what someone else is willing to go through
02:11:12you have no idea just like you can't look at a guy that's going through seal training and say oh
02:11:15that guy's going to make and that guy's not no you have no idea so you look at a whole country and
02:11:19you're going to say oh this is how they're going to behave you have no idea how they're going to
02:11:22be and you don't really understand their culture and even if you did understand their culture from
02:11:26your college that you went to in new york you don't understand what it's like on the ground so
02:11:31we we make a lot of moves that we shouldn't be making just because we think we can predict things
02:11:34that we can't predict yeah i saw a lot of that in the iran stuff where you'd have a professor
02:11:37like i've been studying unilateral by proxy warfare for 30 years my analysis and you're like dude shut up
02:11:43shut up you have no idea you do not know about it is it's got to be hard to be someone who's
02:11:49supposed to make predictions because you there's so many ways that it can go wrong and literally
02:11:55only one way that it can go right yeah like of all of the different ways that the future could unfold
02:12:00i'm pinning my colors to the mast of this one yeah and every single other bet that could happen
02:12:05for reasons that i do or don't know about i'm just fucked dude i i read a book called uh the next
02:12:10hundred years i don't know if i talked about this before by george friedman and he he wrote
02:12:14it i think like i would say the early 2000s maybe like 2010 you know 10 or whatever but he i remember
02:12:20i only read half but he was pretty he predicted our um uh russia ukraine conflict back then almost to
02:12:27like the t it was i don't know i have to look it up but it was definitely written maybe like 10 years
02:12:34before the russia ukraine thing happened did he say why he thought he was gonna he was just saying they
02:12:38have to like it's an adventure like russia needs that area to secure their because like their borders
02:12:42are so weak because like from ukraine it's just you're right there to the major cities so like
02:12:45they're going to have to do that eventually how much is that that russia ukraine conflict am
02:12:51aware you're not an active participant in the way that you used to be but has that changed
02:12:55the sort of landscape of how people think about warfare tactically totally i mean a hundred percent
02:13:01the drones is a totally new world that's a totally new world and it's very interesting just how fast
02:13:08they make changes and adjust to the technology and the tactics as well has been incredible to see so
02:13:14it's full like capitalism warfare meaning that the faster you can adapt and do things a different way
02:13:22in a new way that's successful and put more resources behind that that's what they're doing
02:13:26and they're doing it very rapidly that's what's keeping the ukrainians in the game is that they're just
02:13:31like they're like i read an article about there was an element there's there's these drone elements
02:13:37right drone units of of ukrainians and they basically say hey here's how we're keeping score
02:13:44go do as much damage as you can whoever does the most damage out of these i don't know what the
02:13:47numbers but four or five let's say four or five platoons of drone operators okay whoever gets the
02:13:52most action or destroys the most uh russian we're gonna give you more money and that's exactly what
02:13:58they're gamified they're gamified and so they're going okay well what can we do how can we make
02:14:02this work how can we and they're just figuring out a way to win and they're doing it very rapidly this
02:14:05is what this is what america's not good at right this is why anduril companies like anduril who are
02:14:11just going to make stuff and do it very rapidly are going to end up being much more valuable than the
02:14:17than the old traditional unless raytheon and and those other big ones make adjustments they're not
02:14:23going to be able to keep up with a company like anduril because capitalism on the battlefield is
02:14:28a really important thing the way things are moving so quickly capitalism warfare is so cool yeah does
02:14:34sound sick yeah what uh what are the changes so it's mostly drones that's oh yeah it's drones the
02:14:41drones are totally totally different yeah i mean you guys all watch the videos i'm sure you guys you know
02:14:46stay up at night watching videos of these things going on doing headset but like one of the most
02:14:50interesting things if you're tracking this you know the the the original drones were all controlled
02:14:56by radio right radio frequencies and those things are getting blocked and jammed and so all these new
02:15:01drones are controlled by by wire by by you know filament um fiber optics and they can go they have fiber optic
02:15:11cables that are 60 kilometers long what and so you got this it looks like a little tube on the and and
02:15:19there's a whole thing in there wrapped with the filament and they find these things 60 kilometers
02:15:24and they're doing and the whole battlefield over there is now draped with this this filament this
02:15:30this fiber optic film it's like like spider webs but you know this is what they're doing this is
02:15:36what about stuff you're not allowed to do like biological warfare or like even the shock things we're
02:15:40talking about i see things where people were like dude we were in a crowd and then they just hit
02:15:44us with this thing that you're not supposed to do but like was it not in venezuela yeah but what
02:15:49about the venezuela riot and the energy weapon jared this is crazy yeah wow what is it called like is
02:15:56there's some sort of like um term for it that where they can like make noise like shoot noise
02:16:03some kind but like what about all that like that when we got to be ahead of the curve yeah and the
02:16:09thing is there'll be a counter for that stuff just like they're you know if they're going to figure out
02:16:12a way to counter these filament drones like their technology will yeah they will find a way to defend
02:16:17itself and they'll make another adjustment to that and they'll just keep doing that so it'd be much more
02:16:22the the pace of technological advancement is what we'll what we'll see now in the in the wars from
02:16:29here on out you know in iraq when i was in iraq like the insurgents would figure out how to put a
02:16:36bomb in the road and then we'd figure out how to build armor and then they'd figure out how to build a
02:16:40bigger bomb and then when we started jamming you know they were detonating them with with walkie
02:16:45talkies and so we figured out how to jam them and then they figured out how to put like pressure
02:16:48plates in the road so it's just a technological race but those those cycles would take months you
02:16:53know four months three months six months but these things are just happening much more rapidly yeah
02:16:58the bioweapon shit scares me man that's like the i watched the uh interview with uh rfk jr on cnn
02:17:04did you see that him and i forget the lady's name they were going at it it was actually pretty cool to
02:17:09watch but the at one point i could be wrong but i could have sworn she was like well what are you
02:17:13going to do the experts say there will be another pandemic in 10 years and she almost said it like
02:17:18it's happening what do you and i was just like well the fuck do you know why you say it was almost
02:17:22like it sounded like she was very certain being like oh it's gonna happen she thinks she's the
02:17:26simpsons calling a shot oh this is kind of like first of all why it's weird to be like oh there
02:17:31definitely will be another pandemic well they used to like hitler and stuff used to play with bugs and like
02:17:35like like literally like you do break rules of war like you're not allowed to like put diseases and
02:17:41bugs and then release bugs into a field and go it'll get them like there's there's rules or they're
02:17:46supposed to be rules and that's a long time ago so i can't i can't uh rule out that there must not be
02:17:52people trying to figure this stuff out i would say definitely yeah yeah annie jacobson i want the
02:17:58inside scoop come on again annie jacobson came on the show and she was talking about biological war
02:18:02the russians had developed this weapon that had you know you need to think about the incubation
02:18:07period the mortality the transmissibility all of this stuff and they put one of the side effects
02:18:13of this disease this infectious disease was euphoria so people would feel great for about
02:18:2024 hours and go out dancing go out partying want to go and be social go for dinner spend time with
02:18:25friends they'd engineered euphoria into the pathogen oh so you go spread super spreader yeah it would
02:18:33encourage you because if you feel sick then you're in bed and maybe you don't go and they'd realize so
02:18:37if we make people feel great they'll spread this even faster that was that made still now sort of
02:18:44hairs on my arm like it makes me feel so have we got the the energy weapon jared is this thing it also
02:18:50wouldn't even work on me if i got that i'd be like i'm staying in yeah i watch love on the spectrum
02:18:55i'm not going anywhere i feel too good to go out
02:19:02right there whoa
02:19:06calls are mounting in serbia for an independent investigation into whether a sonic weapon was
02:19:11used by security forces on people protesting government corruption although it doesn't look
02:19:16like it a progressive serbian opposition party alleged that a sonic weapon look at this class
02:19:22not included on the government's list of legal totally silent this is the video you see here
02:19:31just from nothing like out of nowhere but you think that they would go like uh or like they would
02:19:36mix it they didn't they kind of just like sensed a panic that something's coming and you're right that
02:19:40panic like in world war one they had to get control over the guys that would run messages back and
02:19:46forth because if a guy was running from the front line back to tell his commander what was going on
02:19:50and like i go running away and you see me and you're like oh jocko's running you start running you guys
02:19:54we all just start running so there might have been a little bit of that in that scenario also like
02:19:58usually if it's really jolting you like that like you lose um you know bodily fluid all the stuff
02:20:04like you would see someone having a reaction to it is what i'm saying you piss yourself and be like what
02:20:09the hell i thought they used that so venezuela was the country disarming you know yeah something
02:20:13happened i heard i heard that about venezuela that they one day they're sitting there and the
02:20:17they just kind of came right in or they cut their power where they cut their power or something
02:20:21for the extraction yeah yeah no i'm speaking to the right guy here things that you can't say
02:20:27how much do you get without saying it how much do you still get to find out about cool
02:20:32shit that goes on like do you still get to hear some cool shit i hear and how do you hear it they
02:20:37can't text it to you yeah they can't text it to you how do you hear it so cool knowing about cool
02:20:41it'll be the right whatsapp chat you're in the right whatsapp that's what i'm saying it's like
02:20:44where are they sharing this secret information don't even worry about access dude just gotta
02:20:47fuck it yeah he goes hey jump on the cb radio no one's in here yeah yeah did that really happen
02:20:52did we do testosterone for the soldiers or i saw that in the headline of course can we give
02:20:57soldiers testosterone well yeah i think they that's what they're saying is they're opening it up
02:21:02and you know there is there is a guys have had problems with this and it's the same
02:21:07you know the the tbi is the traumatic brain injuries one of the things that impacts is like your ability
02:21:12to i guess is it your pineal gland that makes testosterone cacao cacao we get some cacao and some
02:21:19so guys that guys that have issues with that they you know and plus they're stressed out all the time
02:21:24they don't get much sleep and all this stuff and it impacts their testosterone so they're saying
02:21:29they're gonna check them more and get more testosterone how many guys that are in special
02:21:34forces do you think are doing it without any they're not on any pain meds not on any sleep meds and any
02:21:40anti-anxiety stuff is it rare that someone's not supported in one form or another because i had dj
02:21:45shipley there and he might be an extreme case but he was explaining he's on 50 tablets a day he's on up
02:21:50is to wake him up and down is to get him down and painkillers to stop his pain yeah yeah i mean i
02:21:55think i think for someone like dj who gets on that cycle of you get hurt right you don't want to stop
02:22:01working so you got to take something to make the pain go away so then you start taking something to
02:22:05make the pain go away and the pain gets worse because you're not trained you're not uh giving
02:22:10any rest and so now you're doing more stuff to make the pain go away well eventually you go i need
02:22:14something to get me back to focus because my pain's going away and so is my you know motor skills so now
02:22:18you're going on something else so i think that's the cycle that guys can get caught on um but you
02:22:23know i there's a lot of people that don't do anything you know what i mean i mean i never
02:22:28even took ambien like there was a lot of guys that would take ambien to sleep i never took i never
02:22:32took anything i never took your entire military career yeah and but i don't think i'm not i don't
02:22:37think that's as rare as you might think it is but i will say when guys get hurt dj's got the exact
02:22:44story like a guy gets hurt no one wants to come out of the game right no one wants to come out of the
02:22:49game so you do whatever you got to do to stay in the game and that means you're the cycle that i just
02:22:54talked about so that definitely happens because you're in an injury prone job i mean you get just
02:23:00the day-to-day life fast roping out of helicopters landing on this deck of a ship that's going up and down
02:23:06you know humping through the desert carrying buddy carrying people like it's a day-to-day
02:23:11grind on your body that is you know the bad back bad shoulders bad knees the whole nine yards and
02:23:17that's happening all the time so guys have to do what they want to do or what they have to do to
02:23:21stay in the game you imagine if comedy was a sober pursuit if no one was allowed to use any enhancements
02:23:28i know i think about that a lot actually is like how often we call something cheating it's like who cares
02:23:33yeah like dude if you found out that like some of the most brilliant minds of the past were using some
02:23:38sort of enhancement or psilocyte he wouldn't give a shit like he wrote a great song yeah that was
02:23:44whatever yeah same with that like people go uh because i know a lot of like um military guys but
02:23:49then also policemen and uh fire department who they do steroids or they'll do like testosterone and
02:23:55i go good i want you to be a strong whatever you think is gonna work bro you're not hitting home
02:23:59runs for the giants you know like you like we need you the best you can be dude so yeah you use it
02:24:06but also we should all use it if you're gonna make better comedy because you smoke pot or you
02:24:10do mushrooms or whatever then whatever it takes i think about that with business you know business
02:24:14is an untested federation but no one in the futsy 100 500 is going actually i need to do a blood test
02:24:21sony because it seems like oh yeah that ceo wasn't using modafinil and adderall and testosterone and
02:24:29ambien to make sure so people care about sports because it's supposed to be a really fair organization
02:24:36but in the world of business which people care about maybe even more than they care about sports
02:24:40totally untested there's this famous clip of sam altman from it's quite a while ago and somebody's
02:24:46asking him when he was on his grind at y combinator how how many hours per day can you be productive
02:24:51he says well if you're taking armadafinil you know up to kind of 18 or 20 i suppose and you think
02:24:56oh yeah i actually if you're in some fast-paced tech
02:25:00organization there is no limit you just do whatever you do and no one's going to come in and go this is
02:25:06bad for your health or whatever you're maximizing shareholder value who gives a fuck right
02:25:10and comedy comedy's kind of the same if this makes you perform better no comic can go hey man your set
02:25:17was good last night but i'd love to see you do it without weed right yeah no well that's why i get
02:25:22so mad about the steroid conversation in baseball because i'm like let them do it i would do whatever
02:25:26it took to be the best at comedy like so if there was some way to cheat take a little injection and i now
02:25:32i'm the funniest guy that affects my money that affects my reputation i'd do it so i get it when
02:25:38baseball players are going hey man i want to play baseball i want to go fight for my country like
02:25:43you you take what you're gonna do what you do to stay in the game it's the thing around
02:25:47military operators if there's pushback against them being given something that makes them more
02:25:52effective it's we are not supposed to be playing within the rules there are some rules right geneva
02:25:57convention outside of those and a couple of other things that your government puts on top of you it's
02:26:01like everything should be on the table surely surely if there's one thing that we can all agree
02:26:06national security and not dying and killing the other guy like that should be pretty uncontroversial
02:26:11yeah and it's easy to get caught up in like the short term because look if i'm not the best i
02:26:16possibly can be right now then i'm not gonna live right so i'm just gonna do whatever i can right now
02:26:22but i think the long-term negative health impacts that they have is like you don't want to take these
02:26:27guys cool and just destroy them from a health perspective so when they're 35 they're just like
02:26:32train wrecks trading in their performance today but like killing them tomorrow and there is some to some
02:26:38element to the fact that hey if i'm like on steroids and now i'm on deployment and i go into the field
02:26:45for 24 days do i have no like natural testosterone am i just a disaster yeah i do in my pack i've got a
02:26:53small cool bag with a couple of ice packs so i can keep my testosterone and make sure that yeah well that
02:26:58legless guy brought a cake to mount everest you can pack some syringes and get a little come on
02:27:04what are we talking about he had candles 34 get out of here but also it depends too like is it saying
02:27:12they can have it if they want or you're getting like 20 year olds to be like bro no i think they're
02:27:17just testing them i think it should be enforced yeah like you have to have 1500 nanogram per
02:27:23deciliter of testosterone and if you don't you're not doing your best yeah we need you at your best
02:27:27i know that you need to be working hard or just at that point it's like go mech suits
02:27:32go what mech suits we have like the robot oh i like those i've seen those a lot on movies
02:27:37that's the alternative that's how i know yeah why not what do you think about um psychedelic therapy for
02:27:43ptsd and stuff dj's on here talking about ibogaine and all of this stuff yeah i haven't done it um i
02:27:50i know a lot of guys that have done it and it's been very helpful to them and i know a smaller number
02:27:56of guys that have done it hasn't been helpful so like it's adverse or just not helpful there's been
02:28:01some that have been adverse but that's a pretty small number compared to the amount and and i i believe
02:28:07that the people have had adverse impact they didn't do it correctly the integrate they didn't do the
02:28:14what yeah they didn't do the pre-work and the all that other stuff that you're supposed to do they
02:28:18just kind of like got after it you know what i mean so yeah i i think that's a jeff that can be
02:28:25problematic yeah yeah so but yeah it seems like and they're doing legislation and everything now to
02:28:32try and make it legal and acceptable and paid for by the va and all that stuff so hopefully
02:28:39it's it's helpful i mean like i said i've known some guys that have i've known a bunch of guys that
02:28:42have done it it's been very helpful so if it helps guys out yeah by all means how many people do you
02:28:47think veterans would be fixed by getting one more tour i wonder whether it's the missing being a part
02:28:54of it feeling like they've got something unrequited or whether it's like a compounding effect over time
02:29:00you've said that in and around ramadi was like one of the best times of your life you know i wonder
02:29:05whether you ever wished it like if i could just go back for like a couple of weeks 100 yeah i mean
02:29:11everybody would uh well basically almost everybody that i know if you told them if i sent out a text
02:29:16message to my guys and was like hey get your gear together i would get 97 of the guys like roger
02:29:24inbound like of course yeah is that not the coolest thing i love that we like evidently selected the
02:29:30right people for the job you know like a school teacher that's 20 years retired going hey do you
02:29:35want to come and teach a class no way i don't want to go back in there meanwhile someone that's not been
02:29:41in combat for a little while it's like yeah just give me the call we were uh when we got to ramadi
02:29:46and i sent i went out with some of my guys to we were we were in western ramadi and there was real
02:29:51problems in eastern ramadi and we took an element out to eastern ramadi for like a week and it was super
02:29:57gnarly the living conditions were absolutely terrible we're living in a bombed out building
02:30:02dirt floors like uh bugs all over the place very very hot totally uncomfortable and then there was
02:30:09real heavy fighting out there and you know a lot of casualties not with my guys on that particular time
02:30:16but in this week there's a lot of casualties army iraqi army like it's very tough region in ramadi
02:30:23we get done doing some missions out there we come back and i'm gonna send out some guys out there
02:30:28permanently and i'm talking to the platoon commander guy named seth stone i said hey you know you're gonna
02:30:33take some guys out there and he goes well you know i i i don't want to pick someone because i don't want
02:30:38to take guys out there if they don't want to go and i said okay fair enough so i walked into our big
02:30:45platoon space and i wrote on the board you know hey going to camp corregidor and i brought the guys
02:30:52and i'm like hey we're i'm gonna send six or seven guys out there permanently you guys know the deal that
02:30:56were out there if you weren't out there then here's the deal it's terrible living conditions the chances
02:31:01of getting wounded or killed is decently high there's gonna be a lot of operations and i don't
02:31:07know when you're coming back if you guys want if you want to go on that put your name on the board and
02:31:12i walked out and i came back 20 minutes later and every single guy's name was on nice yeah dang i love
02:31:17that so these are americans you know what i mean that's so sick i love it the sickest thing
02:31:25awesome it's so cool i mean while we talk on microphones for a living what if there's a guy
02:31:31you had one guy who just didn't put his name up there i mean everyone else was
02:31:36i figured i would have but everyone else you know some little bitch no no no not not in that crew right
02:31:42yeah yeah he's good john smith one guy wrote someone else's name matt yeah that is really nice
02:31:51when you hear that you're like damn that's awesome yeah just chose the right guys for the job yeah you
02:31:55know it's uh it's wild boys i appreciate you all you're all awesome thanks for having anything coming
02:32:02up any stuff to push any things just shows matt mccuster.com um bunch of stand-up stuff
02:32:08jeffdye.com a little special coming out soon but other than that when's the movie uh movie november
02:32:1325th yep november 25th global release yeah uh i wrote a bunch of kids books kids books have been
02:32:19turned into a movie uh it's made by skydance and it's coming out on apple it's starring chris pratt
02:32:28wait so can you explain it what do you mean the kids books are a movie the kids books so i wrote a
02:32:33bunch of kids books and they're a series of kids books and they turned basically the first two books
02:32:38kind of combined them together to make the first movie way of the warrior kid yeah it comes out
02:32:42november 25th trailer have you seen the trailer oh that's right trailer that's right secret yeah
02:32:48it looks so cool it's so good for families for adults for everybody yeah they call it a four
02:32:55quadrant movie which means everybody in the family from the kids to the grandparents will all and i've seen
02:33:01it you know it's it's so good i'm so so super stoked on it thank you all right thank you so thanks for
02:33:08it bye my beauties dude congratulations you made it to the end of a podcast episode without dying
02:33:16now here's another one go on watch it
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